


That Breathless Charm

by Anwamane_13



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M, kbl_reversebang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-19
Updated: 2013-11-19
Packaged: 2018-01-02 01:09:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 41,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1050725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anwamane_13/pseuds/Anwamane_13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: Kurt has it all. Fame, fortune, friends, guys falling at his feet with the hope that he might consider acknowledging them; he knows how shallow and empty fame can be. He's still trying to let go of some of the traumas caused by McKinley and so he tries to forget how lonely his life has become by centering it around his job. That is until he visits Lima on vacation and meets a certain someone whom he decides to help for a project regarding their glee club. The someone, Blaine, works in musical therapy for children and teenagers with disabilities. Kurt never has time for anyone but himself, yet somehow he finds himself in the middle of this project. Blaine is like an over sized puppy, always happy and full of life. He and his glee club may be exactly what Kurt needs in order to learn that there is more to life than fame. Kurt thinks that he may be falling for Blaine but then, there's always a catch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Author Notes:  
> Written for the Kurt/Blaine Reversebang at the kbl_reversebang community in 2012.  
> Thanks to my wonderful and amazingly fast beta, gottriplets. You were awesome, thank you so, so much! And to katasticthunder, who helped me with the Summary.  
> Art by the wonderful yo_mawari. You can find the artist on LiveJournal: http://yo-mawari.livejournal.com  
> or on Tumblr: http://yomawari.tumblr.com. Go there and say how much you loved the art!

 

                                                                                                                                   

HEY EVERYONE! CHECK OUT THE AMAZING ART BY **yo-mawari** : [here](http://yomawari.tumblr.com/post/25346885233/my-art-piece-for-the-kurt-blaine-reverse-big-bang)

 

 

 

                                                                                                    CHAPTER 1

 

 

When Kurt stepped inside the kitchen, his father was buried nose deep in one of Carole’s crappy magazines.

_“Kurt Hummel is one of the most talented artists of our time. The man not only acts like a god, embracing his characters like a second skin, but he also sings like an angel. Raised in Lima, Ohio, Kurt moved to New York at eighteen and enrolled into NYADA, and the rest, as they say, is history._

Hummel is currently on Broadway with the musical “Validation”, running for almost a year at the Imperial Theater. Hummel and his co-star, Rachel Berry, have received nightly standing ovations since the musical’s premiere. His character, Rupert, is complex and beautifully flawed, and Mr. Hummel plays him with perfection. From the first time he sees Ada, the love of his life, to the moment she dies in his arms, Hummel and Berry could draw tears from rocks. The story could be a cliché, but it isn’t, because Hummel and Berry are completely in tune with each other. 

Mr. Hummel’s personal life is completely unlike his character’s. He is known to be quite a charmer, and is frequently seen in public with handsome young men, some famous, some completely anonymous, but rarely in the same company more than two or three times. He is openly gay, but has a policy of not talking about his personal life, ever. He’s never been caught in any public displays of affection with any of the gentlemen he goes to dinners and parties with, and so far all of them have been labeled as friends.” 

\--

“Why are you reading this crap, Dad?” Kurt asked, frowning as he opened one of the kitchen’s cabinets looking for his mug.

Burt grimaced. “They have a page dedicated to you.”

“Don’t even tell me what it’s about,” 

Kurt put some water to boil and turned to his father, rolling his eyes. “It’s a tabloid, and nothing good comes from a tabloid, Dad.”

“Carole buys it because of the culinary section.”

“Oh.” Kurt opened the drawer by the sink and started rummaging through it, looking for the tea bags. He turned back to Burt when he heard his father clear his throat. “What, Dad?” he asked, exasperated.

“Aren’t you going to ask me what the article is about?”

Kurt rolled his eyes again. “I wasn’t going to, no. But you seem anxious to tell me, so go ahead. What, do they say how terrible my acting is, or how the play sucks?”

“Actually, no. They say you and Rachel are flawless. You know that, Kurt.” Burt looked at his son, an uncomfortable expression on his face. “The play is a success, you are perfect and everything you touch is gold, sun and rainbows. It’s what they say after that part.”

“Well?” Kurt asked, putting his hands on his waist impatiently. “Tell me, then.”

“They say you go out a lot with…they make you seem…”

“Dad, let it out!”

“They make you seem promiscuous, dammit! I don’t like the way they talk about your personal life!”

Kurt closed his eyes, thinking about what to say. “Dad,” he started, forgetting about the tea and sitting down at the table next to Burt. “You know how these tabloids work. The only reason they’re saying that is because they don’t know anything about my personal life. You   
know how private I am, and the only reason they’re writing all this shit is because they have to dig up anything they can about me, otherwise they have nothing to write about. Gossip sells a lot, you know.” 

“But you never talk about your life anymore, son.” Burt scratched his head, looking hesitant. “I know your life here wasn’t easy and I know how lonely you were, but you used to come to me when you needed to. Now, it seems we don’t talk anymore, Kurt. I’m not even sure   
you still trust me enough to talk about your life, son.”

“Of course I trust you!” Kurt snapped. He asked in a worried tone, “You think I’ve changed?”

Burt shook his head. “You seem the same to me,” he said, lowering his eyes to the table.

“But?” Kurt prodded.

“Well, Carole buys these gossip magazines from time to time, and there’s stuff about things you said, parties you went, guys you dated…They make you seem cold, distant, not to mention they say you’re the gay equivalent of a Don Juan, and it makes me think, ‘who’s this   
guy?’” 

Kurt rolled his eyes, impatiently. He loved his father more than anything, but right now he wanted to strangle Carole for buying the damn magazine that had prompted this more than awkward conversation.

Burt hadn’t finished, though. “I’ve always hoped that… you know, when you were in New York, living your dream, things would change. And since you moved, I’ve been waiting to meet that special guy in your life. But…every time you come home for vacation, you come alone.   
Every time we go to New York,” Burt shrugged, “there doesn’t seem to be someone special there, but there are a lot of ‘just someones’, from what I can tell.” 

“You shouldn’t believe that crap they write,” Kurt snapped again. He caught himself and continued in a more gentle tone. “Honestly, most of the guys I’m seen with are really just friends. They need gossip to sell their poor attempt at a magazine, so they write what they want   
and people believe it. Honestly, I don’t care,” he finished, in a cold tone. 

“Your fans love you, Kurt. You should care about what they think.”

“Of course they do; I’m fabulous. And they do go to see my plays, so if they wanna talk about me, let them talk. Everything is mostly made up, anyway.” Kurt sighed, wanting to go back to sleep. He was on vacation, so that’s what he should be doing right now: sleeping.   
“There’s a big difference between the ‘public’ me and the real one,” he said with finality, hoping it was enough for Burt.

It wasn’t.

“All right, maybe I’m exaggerating,” Burt conceded, “but don’t blur the lines between public and real, son, because sometimes? I think you do.” 

Kurt sighed. “Well, you’re wrong. I don’t. If there’s something I’ve learned in this job, it’s that I can’t be too open, because people only want to see Kurt Hummel, the performer. They don’t care about the real me, as long as I’m acting, singing, entertaining. And frankly, when   
they do care,” he shivered a little, “sometimes they get a little creepy, stalking me and sending me presents you don’t want to know about, and I hate the invasion of privacy that comes along with everything.”

“Well, if there are people stalking you, I’m glad you’re not a movie star.”

Kurt smiled softly at that. “I can see you’re fully into ‘father mode’ today,” He patted Burt’s hand over the table, making his father look him in the eyes. “Frankly, Dad, there’s no one. No prince-charming banging at my door. I’m not a saint or anything, but I don’t jump into bed   
with every guy I meet. I have boyfriends, of course, but I never go on dates on public. And yes, that sucks, because I should be able to do that. But the thing is that… there’s no one special enough that I want to bring to my home in Lima, to introduce to my family. There has   
never been. I pretty much live for my work, and I put so much time into it that I don’t have time or energy for anything else. I just…” he shrugged a little, “performing is all I am, it’s all that I want for my life. I don’t care about the rest.”

“Performing is not gonna keep your feet warm at night,” Burt reasoned then smirked a little. “I feel like I’m in some bizarre movie where I have to tell my adult son to find a boyfriend. I worry, Kurt. The magazine said you’ve been out with lots of guys and I just… I don’t like it,   
Kurt.”

“And you think I do? Even though I know fame has a price, I hate it. But we all knew it was going to happen if I ever got famous… unless I sucked at acting and singing, then no one would give a shit about me. In this case, I’m glad things are the way they are.”

“Yeah, the price of fame, alright,” Burt sighed. “You’re an adult, Kurt, you’ve been living by yourself for almost ten years… you know what’s best f, son. I just worry that you’re just as lonely in New York as you were when you lived here in Lima.”

“Dad, I’m living my dream. I’m where I’m supposed to be, I’m not lonely, I assure you. I have all I ever wanted: fame, money, friends… I love my work; people love to see me performing! What else could I wish for?”

Burt threw his hands up in exasperation. “Oh I don’t know, Kurt, maybe someone to share your life with?”

Kurt laughed, amused by Burt’s worry. “Dad, I’m twenty-eight. My career needs my full attention. Why would I want to get attached to someone and give up my freedom? I have no one tying me down, telling me what to do, demanding time I can’t give… this way is simpler, a   
win-win situation, don’t you think?”

Burt grimaced, but there was a playful glint in his eyes. “So, Finn is the only one who will give me grandchildren?”

“If that’s what you expect from me, you better give up. I love my nephews, really, but… I’ve never been good with children, and to raise one… there would have to be someone I really cared about and I just… there’s no place for anyone else in my life right now. If that   
someone ever comes, you’ll be the first to know.” Kurt patted Burt’s hand again. “But hey, don’t hold your breath here, alright? Just because you’ve found the love of your life – twice, I must add – it doesn’t mean we all will. I’m happy, I have a great life. Let’s leave it like that,   
okay?”

“Hey buddy, I’m a Dad. Worrying is my job.”

Kurt nodded, smiling softly again. “I couldn’t have wished for a better father, you know that. I’m all right, don’t worry about me.”

“I love you, Kurt.”

“I love you too, Dad.”

\---

“Kurt, I can’t even start to tell you how happy I am that you agreed to do this.”

“Honestly, Mr. Schue, it’s nothing.” But it was, it so was.

“The kids will be crazy when they see you. They’re all your fans, and your presence may give them the motivation they need for Nationals next week. To think you started here, at McKinley…”

Kurt smiled at his old teacher – now with a lot more white hair than before – and straightened his tie again. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to meet McKinley’s current glee club; it was that the school hadn’t really left him good memories. Apart from the glee club and the friends he’d   
made there, high school had been a nightmare. David Karofsky’s harassment in senior year had been almost unbearable, and if not for Puck, Sam, Mike and all the others, he firmly believed he wouldn’t have survived. It hadn’t been easy being the – unrequited, of course – love interest of a closet case who also was a violent bully. His friends had formed a safe perimeter around him, but it had always made him feel like a sore thumb. How many teenagers needed body guards to go to school?

“I’m so happy you came,” Schue went on. “You’re gonna love the kids. They’re great, talented and really committed to winning the competition next week.”

Kurt smiled faintly and nodded, looking around, doubting that he would really love a bunch of teenagers. He had met Mr. Schue at the grocery store, of all places, and his ex-teacher had asked him to come and meet the kids, so how could Kurt say no? Mr. Schue had been the   
first one to believe in his talent – even though most of the solos belonged always to Rachel and Finn, the golden couple. Now, walking by his side towards the choir room, he had mixed feelings. He was used to a big audience, so why was he nervous about meeting some kids?

McKinley seemed to be frozen in time. The same corridors, the same lockers, the same walls. Nothing seemed different. “Everything looks the same,” Kurt said, eyeing Mr. Schue. “Ten years and the halls still look like the janitors didn’t come to work today.”

“Yeah, can’t do a lot about the building but a lot has changed. Believe it or not, we now have a no bullying policy. And it really works, let me tell you. Oh, and we also have a gay-straight alliance, among other things. After Figgins retired and… well, a lot changed here, and   
people started to see things differently.”

“Magically? Just like that? It’s hard to believe.”

“Of course not. Some, um… some things happened, and because of that…” Mr. Schue looked like he was about to say something, but changed his mind, and the subject. “But hey, glee club is respected now! There’s actually competition to get a place in New Directions. I believe   
you and Rachel are the main reason for that; everyone wants to be like you.”

“Wow. I never thought I’d see the day the glee club kids wouldn’t be considered outcasts.”

Mr. Schue laughed. “Oh, they still are; only, now they’re proud of it.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Kurt faked a laugh. Damn, why had he agreed to come again?

“Here we are,” Mr. Schue said, walking into the room and pulling Kurt along with him by the arm. “Good afternoon, everyone!”

When everyone realized who he was, Kurt instantly saw himself surrounded by the New Direction kids, who wanted to know literally everything about his work, Broadway, New York and what it took to get there, as they called it. Some of them were in awe of Kurt’s presence,   
and just looked at him with their mouths hanging open. 

The difference was that they were all… respectful. None of them invaded Kurt’s personal space. None of them touched him. And it was such strange behavior for a bunch of teenagers that Kurt relaxed around them, and when he caught himself, he realized he was actually   
having a good time.

So, when one of them shyly asked him to come and see their rehearsals every day for the rest of the week – until they had to go to LA for the Nationals – and also to help Mr. Schue with Broadway tips and the routines figurine Kurt said yes. Later, he asked himself why several   
times, because hadn’t he promised to himself never to set foot in McKinley again? But he said yes, and just like that, committed himself to a week of helping the ‘new’ New Directions, every afternoon. 

At four PM sharp, Mr. Schue’s cell phone beeped. “That’s our cue, guys,” the teacher said, after turning it off. “Today we’re going to rehearse at the auditorium, and the band’s waiting for us.”

Mr. Schue and Kurt went straight to the audience while the kids took their places on the stage. They sat side by side on the third row, the stage lights were turned on…

And then Emma Pillsbury – no, Emma Schuester now, - entered the stage running, hand in hand with a young man. “Sorry, everyone!” she said when they stopped, right in the middle of the stage. “Some things came up at ‘Take One’ and we couldn’t leave earlier. Will? Are you   
there?” she said, frowning, the stage lights too strong for her to see the audience.

“Yeah, we’re here. Come sit with us!” Mr. Schuester said, and she left the stage, but the guy stayed.

“I’m really sorry we’re late, Mr. Schue!” the man said, protecting his eyes from the light, trying to see the audience. “The kids at T1 were antsy today,” he shrugged as a way of excuse, and turned his back to them, walking towards the black piano on the stage. “But hey, I’m   
yours for the rest of the day,” he joked. On his way, he greeted each one of the New Directions kids, patting the boys’ backs and squeezing the girls’ hands. No one seemed to complain that he was taking his time to greet them; they were clearly fond of the guy.

Kurt looked at his watch, a little impatient. Not that he had anything else to do, but half the afternoon had passed, and he’d promised Burt to be there for dinner. Couldn’t this guy greet the kids later, or go a little faster. Hadn’t he realized he was delaying the rehearsal? 

On the stage, the young man sat by the black piano on the right side, right in front of Kurt, turned to the audience and smiled. “We’re ready!”

And that was when Kurt took a look at his face.

The guy was simply gorgeous. Black, curly, short hair, arranged gracefully but casually on his head as if he'd just woken up. Strong jaw, harmonic features, like - and Kurt almost laughed loud at his own thought - a Disney prince. And, okay, maybe his eyebrows were thicker   
than they should be and had funny - almost triangular - shapes, but frankly, they just added to the guy’s perfect face. He seemed to be shorter than Kurt, and thin, but not too much, just a perfect slim waist and what seemed to be a toned torso and strong arms.  
Kurt couldn't take his eyes off the guy. Maybe being here every afternoon wouldn’t be a bad idea, after all.

When Emma sat beside Mr. Schue she squealed as soon as she saw Kurt. He smiled at her, trying to look excited and happy at seeing her after so many years, but deep down he was relieved at Mr. Schue's "Shhh, you can hug him later, they're about to start."  
The New Directions kids were good. The small Asian girl and a tall blond boy - Kazue and Ernest, Kurt learned later, - had powerful voices and sang perfectly, while the other members swayed and hummed at the background, just like all the New Directions numbers had always been: the lead couple on the center of the stage and the rest on the background, harmonizing with them.

But as soon as the first part of the song ended everything changed, and Kurt was so surprised that he let out a small gasp: all the members came to the front and started to sing and dance. Each one of them sang one or two lines, then all of them sang together, the perfect definition of a choir. The dance movements were synchronized and some were even complex, their voices fitting perfectly. The first song morphed into the second and then into the third one gracefully and effortlessly, never breaking the pattern: one of them came to the center of the stage, sang his or her lines, then everyone sang together again. It was a beautiful thing to see, the way everyone was able to show their individual talent and then how good they were as a group, everything building up to the final moment, where they all   
gathered at the center of the stage, their voices suddenly silent while the instruments played their final notes.

It was beautiful and obviously rehearsed a lot, nothing like they had done when Kurt was a part of the glee club. Kurt didn't remember anything about choir competitions anymore, but he was fairly sure these kids had a big chance to win.  
During the whole number Kurt had found himself staring at the pianist and then making himself look at New Directions, only to realize a few minutes later that he was staring at the young man again. His hands ran flawlessly across the keyboard, but the most impressive thing about him was the way he seemed to come alive playing; his face seeming illuminated not from the stage lights, but from the inside. Like he barely could contain the energy inside him.

"Let's do it again, guys!" the pianist said happily, sounding like he was inviting them to an afternoon at the beach. "You were all amazing, but I think we should do it again just to be sure we're doing everything right."

To Kurt’s surprise, no one complained or even showed boredom or tiredness. They just went to their initial places again, smiling at the pianist, while he waved at the rest of the band to get ready again.

Kurt raised his eyebrows and looked at Mr. Schue. The teacher seemed to feel Kurt's stare and nudged at his arm, while the number started again at the stage. "Blaine is a perfectionist," he whispered as way of explanation. "But the kids don't mind, they love him and they know he means good."

"Blaine? Is he your co-director?" Kurt whispered back.

"Oh, no, no. You remember Brad, don't you?" when Kurt nodded, Mr. Schue went on. "Brad retired last year and Blaine came to work with us. He's a great musician, he's great with the kids - they value his opinion, and so do I. So, if he says they need to do it again, they do it again."

"Wow," Kurt whispered back, because since when had William Schuester listened to anyone's opinions but his own regarding the glee club? A lot had really changed here. Kurt didn’t even remember seeing Brad give an opinion about anything… he was pretty much considered furniture. This guy though, who looked so young he could easily be one of the kids at New Directions, this guy told them what to do and Mr. Schue didn’t bat an eye? Wow, indeed.

When the number finished and Mr. Schue told the kids they could go home, a lot of them didn't, gathering around Blaine and talking to him like old friends. In the third row, Kurt was suddenly pulled into a hug by Emma, and spent a few minutes talking to her and being hugged over and over. Apparently she had gotten over her obsession with germs. Surprisingly, he didn’t mind the hugs. Emma seemed softer, calmer now. Maybe she had overcome her problem with age? And, of course, a lot of therapy?

The next thing he knew, the stage lights were turned off and Kurt was being directed towards the exit by Emma's hand on his arm. Mr. Schue was already in the corridor talking to Blaine, while the young man talked animatedly about something. Once, his eyes caught Kurt's and he smiled - and whoa! He had a beautiful smile and his eyes were hazel like -

“Crap!” Kurt told himself. “The guy is Mr. Schue’s protégé or something like that. Now he’s completely friend zoned. Good thing I’m not that interested.” 

"Why don't we all go out tonight?" Emma suggested. "I want to know everything about you, Kurt! Broadway must be the most amazing place in the whole world! And your play, my God, I heard it's awesome! I’m still waiting for Will to take me to New York to see it…"

“Mr. Schue told me he'll watch our rehearsals this whole week," said a silky voice at Kurt's side, and suddenly Blaine was there, while Mr. Schue stopped beside his wife. "I'm sure there'll be a lot of time to catch up with Mr. Hummel," Blaine added, smiling amicably at Kurt as if they'd already known each other.

"Let the man go home, Emma," Mr. Schue said, kissing her cheek. "Kurt came here to rest and we've already taken his whole afternoon."

“Hello, I'm Blaine Anderson," the young man said, extending his hand to Kurt. He had a firm grip, and this close he looked even younger and fuller of energy. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Hummel."

“Kurt,” he said, smiling, turning to the guy. “Call me Kurt.”

“Okay, Kurt,” Blaine smiled effortlessly at him and Kurt, so used to have people throwing themselves at is feet all the time and babbling every time they met him, welcomed Blaine’s easy smile and the way he was looking at Kurt as if having a Broadway star at McKinley High was the most natural thing in the world. “What did you think of our number?”

“I liked it,” Kurt said sincerely, and Blaine beamed at him. “They’re really good.”

“They’re all excited that you’re going to be here the whole week. Thank you, Kurt. They can really use the extra motivation,” Blaine said, still smiling.

“They seemed pretty motivated in my opinion,” Kurt smiled back, because how could he not? Blaine’s smile was contagious.

“Well, this year… I think their chance at actually winning is great. Although ND has only won the Nationals twice, they’ve always placed among the top ten since the first time they won in 2012– well, you were there – but it’s been what… five years since they won again? Yeah, I   
think it’s been five years and… anyways, they’re anxious, excited and terrified. I’m sure you remember the feeling,” Blaine said.

“That I do,” Kurt said, and the memory came rushing to him: the standing ovation they got, the huge first place trophy, the feeling of being at the top of the world. “Gosh, I will never forget how it felt. When we won, it was…everything. That day will be imprinted in my mind forever.”

Kurt distinctly saw a shadow crossing Blaine’s face, but maybe it was because they were so close… or maybe it was his imagination, because Blaine’s smile turned even brighter. “Yeah, well, I hope the kids will have a day like that; they deserve it.” He looked at his watch and frowned. “Oh no, not again! I completely lost track of time!” He briefly squeezed Kurt’s hand unceremoniously, turning to Mr. Schue and Emma. “Percival is waiting for me, he gets anxious when I’m not at home by six. See you tomorrow! Bye, Kurt, it was great to meet you!”

Before Kurt knew it, Blaine was far down the corridor, running, his sneakers making a screeching noise on the floor.

TBC  


 


	2. Chapter 2

Kurt loved spending time with his family. Now that Burt was older and had left politics for good, he had a lot more time for Kurt whenever he came to visit. His father still worked at the garage, but only part-time, and Carole still worked as a nurse, but not taking night shifts anymore. That left them a lot of time to spend with Kurt and Finn, who lived in Columbus but came home every summer on weekends with his wife and kids. But there wasn’t much they could do in Lima. Definitely, staying the whole summer in his hometown wasn’t Kurt’s definition of having a good time. The city felt tiny and boring, and after only a week, Kurt was bored out of his mind. 

Yesterday had been great, though. After spending the whole afternoon at McKinley, he’d come home to Carole’s food and Burt’s easy banter. They’d had dinner like the old times, talking and laughing, especially when Finn and Anna arrived with the kids.  
Kurt loved his family, and as he’d watched Finn and Burt fighting over the last muffin, he once more understood why he never went to Europe or Bali or some other glamorous place on his vacation. What was left of Burt’s hair was completely white, and how much more time would he have with his father in his life? He already lived far from him, he wasn’t going to waste his spare time with anyone else but his family. Glamorous places would always be there; Burt and Carole wouldn’t.

As he laid alone on his bed in his old bedroom, the morning sun making itself known through the white curtains, he thought about Burt’s words. “I just worry that you’re as lonely in New York as you were when you lived here in Lima” and “performing is not gonna keep your feet warm at night”, Burt had said. He started to analyze Burt’s words, because he valued them a lot and because his father had always been right about him. But this time, Burt was wrong.

Kurt didn’t feel lonely, not really. He had everything he’d always wanted, and friends to share his life with. If sometimes he caught himself wishing he had someone to share simple moments like having quiet dinners and cuddling in front of the TV, it was only because part of him was still a silly romantic boy from Lima. 

He’d had his fair share of boyfriends and a fling here and there, but he’d never let himself get too attached. They always turned into control freaks after a while and, if Kurt was really sincere with himself, he’d never truly fallen in love with any of them.

He knew some people called him a cold, distant diva, but as long as they didn’t say anything bad about his talent, he didn’t care. Being distant was something he had learned early, as a self-defense mechanism, a remaining trace of his personality from his high school days. Now, Kurt frequently caught himself acting cold and distant, even when he didn’t mean to.

Maybe being stalked by David Karofsky and kissed – and groped – by the huge guy against his will in the locker room had left Kurt with more scars than he cared to think about.

Maybe his discomfort at being touched by anyone but his family – and the occasional boyfriend, because of course you couldn’t have sex without being touched – came from that time. Only, Kurt wasn’t too anxious to examine the subject too closely. If he wanted a therapist, he could easily pay for the best psychologist in the country. 

But he didn’t need one.

What he also didn’t need, despite Burt’s opinion, was a serious relationship. Distractions never led to anything good. When you lived for your career, you had to commit to it and keep on track. Kurt was perfectly happy and fine with his life and his choices. He had his career to focus on and that more than filled his time, he had his friends to keep him company and his family to give him all the love he needed. 

A tiny voice asked him ‘what will you do when Burt and Carole are gone?’, but Kurt shut the voice up getting out of bed and taking a shower. Summer was only starting. He would spend it with his family, at home, enjoying their company all he could, having Friday night dinners and watching football with Burt and Finn – if only to indulge them. Then he would go back to his wonderful job and New York and the crowds, paparazzi, drivers and body-guards. It was tiring, but it was exciting and challenging and it was his life.

He didn’t even stop to think why he still thought about Lima as ‘home’ if he hated the city so much.

\--

Kurt felt at ease in the Lima Bean. After all the years as a regular customer, they were more than used to him during the summers. Whenever he was in town, no one gave him much trouble, and if one or two girls asked him for an autograph, it was alright. At least he didn’t work on TV, or his life would be a true nightmare.

“A non-fat cappuccino,” the girl at the counter announced, and Kurt grabbed his coffee, appreciating the strong aroma. Frowning, he noticed there wasn’t a single table free. It was lunchtime, and apparently the once small coffee shop had grown very popular over the years. Kurt decided to sit outside, but again, there was no empty table in sight. Sighing, he was already walking towards the exit resigned to have his coffee inside is car, when he saw in a corner, a head with familiar, messy curly hair: Blaine, in a red sweater and light blue pants, looking colorful and full of light, like the sun gravitated around him.

“Way to go, Kurt, now you’re making cheesy lines. Good thing you’re not a writer,” said Kurt’s inner little – and very annoying – voice.

At first, Kurt hesitated. Should he approach the guy? Blaine seemed distracted and relaxed, and Kurt didn’t want to bother him. But then he remembered his easy smile and the friendly and natural way Blaine had treated him. Not many people did that when they knew who he was, and Kurt was tired of starry-eyed guys. As he got closer, he noticed that there were books everywhere on the table, save for a small place where Blaine’s lunch was, apparently forgotten. One of Blaine’s hands held a book in a carefree way, and the other slowly petted the head of a golden retriever that sat quietly by his side.

“Hello,” Kurt greeted.

“Kurt, hey!” Blaine smiled, closing the book and getting up. He grabbed Kurt’s arm unceremoniously and pulled him to the other chair, like he had been waiting for him. “Getting your caffeine fix?” he asked, while he made room for Kurt’s coffee. 

Kurt didn’t even realize that he hadn’t mind Blaine’s touch. “Yeah, how about you?” he said, sitting on the chair and looking at all the books on the table. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything?”

“Not at all, I’m just really messy. I have lunch here almost every day. I was… just reading about how to approach a difficult kid I have at T1.”

“T1?”

“The Community Centre I work at. I’m a music therapist, and there’s this kid I’m trying to work with who’s a great kid, but it’s been really hard to break the wall and get to him.”

“Oh,” Kurt said, tilting his head to one side. “I didn’t know that you were a music therapist. Mr. Schue said you were a musician.”

“Yeah…” Blaine shrugged, “It’s a great job and I love it. Doesn’t pay a lot, though. Luckily I don’t need much. It’s just me and Percival here.” He took a bite of his sandwich, which was clearly cold and greasy by now. “Ugh. This tastes…terrible.” Blaine tossed the remains of the sandwich to the dog.

“So, this is Percival?” Kurt asked, looking at the beautiful dog, eating Blaine’s sandwich. They made such a pair, the calm and placid dog and his almost electric owner. “When you left yesterday in a hurry, I thought Percival was someone. That’s an unusual name for a dog.”  
“I named him after a boyfriend I had in college.”

“Oh,” was all Kurt could say at Blaine’s admitting he was gay so naturally like that, almost as an afterthought, sounding so secure and unashamed. 

“Percy ‘the boyfriend’ was always kicking my shoes under the bed. This guy here – and Blaine petted the dog’s head again – did that from day one. It took me weeks to realize he was actually hiding them because they were completely bitten and turned into shreds.”

Kurt laughed at that, trying to imagine Blaine looking for his shoes while the dog looked at him placidly.

“Can’t call this one Percy, though,” Blaine indicated the dog with is head. “He hates it; it’s Percival for him and nothing less, don’t ask me why. He almost bit my brother once because he called him by the nickname.”

“So you have a brother?” Kurt asked curiously, because hadn’t Blaine just told him that he lived alone?

Blaine looked a little reluctant to answer. He looked at the dog, petting him once more. Without looking at Kurt he said, “Um, Yeah… Cooper, he’s… an actor, lives in LA. My, um… my parents live there, too.”

“Oh, you’re from LA?” Kurt asked casually, not understanding the sudden change in Blaine’s mood.

“No,” Blaine shook his head with finality and just like that, changed the subject. “So, are you going to McKinley again today?”

Kurt blinked, a little taken aback at Blaine’s clear message: that subject seemed to be off-limits. But Blaine’s expression showed neither hostility nor annoyance, so Kurt just went with the flow. “Well, I promised the kids I would go.”

“See you there, then?” Blaine said, gathering all the books on the table and putting them inside an old backpack. “At four?”

“I’ll be there.”

“I’m sorry to leave you Kurt, but I really have to go. I have a session at the Centre in half an hour and I still have to take this guy home,” Blaine said, gesturing at Percival. “We live around the corner, but I really don’t want to be late.”

“Of course,” Kurt smiled politely.

Blaine took his hand and squeezed it – a gesture Kurt was starting to associate with the guy, and again, it didn’t bother him at all – and got up. Percival calmly put his head on Kurt’s lap and Kurt raised his eyebrows questioningly at Blaine. “He’s saying goodbye. Pet him and he’ll leave.”

Kurt wasn’t very fond of dogs, but the golden retriever’s brown eyes were practically begging for some form of acknowledgement. Apparently, Percival was as tactile as its owner. So, he ran his hand briefly through the dog’s golden fur and suddenly his lap was free again.

“He likes you,” Blaine said, turning to leave in a blur of movement and color. “See you later, Kurt!”

Kurt calmly finished his coffee and left. He had promised to meet Burt for lunch and he was already a little late. During the whole time it took to go from the coffee shop to the garage, his thoughts never left Blaine and his contagious smile. That, and the way he had practically  
run as soon as his family was mentioned. 

\--

The whole week went like that: Kurt woke up late, almost at eleven – he was on vacation, after all – skipped breakfast, had an early lunch with Burt and Carole at home and went to The Lima Bean for his caffeine fix of the day. Coincidently, he always arrived just in time to catch Blaine having lunch, and the two of them would talk about Blaine’s job and Kurt’s musical, and everything in between. 

It was… easy, being with Blaine. Natural. Kurt, so used to controlling his words and actions because everywhere he went someone would always recognize him, saw himself having long talks with the young man and not having to police himself at all. Blaine treated Kurt like he was only the guy next door, not the Broadway artist, and that pleased Kurt immensely. He, who had always wanted to be ‘different’, this time wanted to be just a guy.

It was great to have a new friend. Blaine’s company was a change in the eternal boredom that was Lima; like a breath of fresh air. He was genuine, his cheery disposition making everything around him brighter. The time they spent together seemed to run faster, and Kurt, more than once, marveled at the fact that he and Blaine had only known each other for a few days now.

He did notice the way Blaine’s incredibly expressive eyes seemed to brighten even more when they were together. Like Blaine sincerely enjoyed his company and the easy banter they had going between them. And if Kurt were to be honest with himself… it felt really good to be around the guy. Blaine had not a single shallow thing about him, and it was a welcome feeling to be able to just… talk to someone, about anything and everything.

Kurt learned that Blaine was twenty-three, that he had gotten his job at the Community Centre with Emma’s help – she had been volunteering there for years, and when Blaine came with his Bachelor’s degree, she arranged him a meeting and just like that, the job was his. Blaine didn’t tell him how he’d met Emma, although Kurt had the impression that he’d known her from before. Anyway, he didn’t ask. He also learned that the place was called ‘Take One Direction’ and not T1, but Blaine abbreviated and nicknamed everything, except for Percival’s name. Blaine’s favorite color was red, he played piano, guitar and a little bit of cello. He loved to sing, but he rarely had occasion, and no, he had never thought about being a professional musician, because he loved what he did.

And just like that, Kurt started to tell Blaine about his own life.

He told Blaine about his first years in New York. How difficult it had been to share an apartment with a diva like Rachel Berry; how everything at NYADA terrified and amazed him at the same time, how hard he had worked for each single audition he’d gotten and how good it felt when he got his first part on a play. He told Blaine that Burt, Carole and a still single Finn had piled themselves in Kurt and Rachel’s tiny place just to see his play, and that he had only a single line in it, but he also had a solo, and he had felt amazing in front of an audience. All his doubts and fears had vanished as soon as he’d started to sing, and it had been the happiest he had been in his life. He also told Blaine that he had moved to his own apartment two years ago, and although it was bigger, had a huge closet and everything he had always wanted in a house, he missed Rachel’s company and how messy she was, even though he saw her every day at the theater.

So, during the whole week, after Blaine’s lunch and Kurt’s coffee, Blaine would go back to work, always in a hurry, running to his afternoon sessions like he could barely wait for them. Kurt would watch him go, every single time wishing he could ask Blaine to stay a little while longer, and wondering what the hell was happening with him, so reserved around people, and why Blaine was the exception.

In the afternoons, at four PM sharp, Kurt was at McKinley for the New Directions’ rehearsals. Blaine arrived late almost every day, but never more than fifteen minutes. No one seemed to care. Whenever he arrived, full of energy, everyone would greet him enthusiastically, as always, and they would start working on the number for Nationals. Kurt helped Mr. Schue once or twice, refining this or that dance move, but mostly he just watched and offered moral support. It seemed to be enough, because every time the kids finished their number, they looked at him expectantly, waiting for his approval. And every time he sincerely told them how great they were Blaine would meet his eyes and smile, thanking him silently for supporting the New Directions kids. 

Friday, the last day, finally came. They would go to LA on Saturday morning, and everyone was nervous was but confident. Blaine didn’t go to the Centre that day, spending it at McKinley and helping the kids with everything they needed. Kurt stayed the whole day with them too, helping with whatever he could, mostly the girls’ dresses, and feeling nostalgic about his time at his old glee club. Glee club had been the first place where Kurt had felt confident enough to be himself, even though every moment he spent at McKinley out of the choir room was terrifying. 

He was almost sad the week was over. He was going to miss the glee club’s energy, and frankly, he’d had a great time with them. 

“I wish Blaine would come with us,” Emma said casually, as they were watching the rehearsal for the last time.

Kurt eyed the dark-haired man, playing with so much enthusiasm, looking so young that he could pass for a glee club member. “I thought he was going,” he said offhandedly, because it seemed natural, since Blaine seemed to be an important part of the club’s support system.  
“He mentioned his family lives in LA, so I thought…”

Emma and Will looked at each other, as if caught by surprise, as if she had said too much. “He’s afraid of planes,” he said. “He’s hates big cities,” she said.

At the same time.

“Excuse me?” Kurt asked dumbly, because what the hell?

“Um…Blaine can’t leave his work right now,” Emma explained, giving Will a meaningful look. “The kids at the Community Centre need him.” 

It could be true of course, but Kurt wasn’t buying that. He was about to open his mouth to ask more, but Mr. Schue silenced him with a gesture.

“Guys, let’s pay attention to the number, okay?” he said, “This is the last time we have to fix anything.” 

Kurt had the distinctive impression that they knew something he didn’t. But of course, they had known Blaine since God knew when, and he just knew the guy for a little more than a week. It wasn’t his place to poke his nose in Blaine’s life. Besides, the guy was what, twenty three, if he’d had a dark past, like serial killer tendencies or something like that, Kurt surely would have heard everything about it by now. 

As Blaine played the final notes of the song, Kurt, Emma and Will got up and applauded the New Directions enthusiastically. So did Blaine, and all the members of the band.

“I think we’re ready, guys,” Will said. “Now, you all go home and finish packing, the plane leaves at eight tomorrow and I don’t want any of you left behind, okay?”

When all the teenagers had gone, profusely thanking Kurt, Blaine and the rest of the band and most of the stage lights were out, Kurt walked slowly to the stage. Blaine was alone, closing the piano and the guitar cases, putting the music sheets in a plastic folder and then inside his backpack. Kurt approached Blaine slowly, realizing that their week working together had ended, and they probably wouldn’t see each other again.

“So…” he started, trying to hide the sad tone in his voice. 

“So…” Blaine turned to him, smiling as always, just not as bright as before.

“I had… a great time this week. Thanks for inviting me,” Kurt said sincerely.

“Well, it was Mr. Schue who invited you,” Blaine said, shrugging, “But I had a great time, too Kurt,” his smile turned softer, “and so did the kids.”

“They’re great to work with,” Kurt said, fully aware that he was stalling because he didn’t want to go home. They had no more reason – or excuse – to see each other again, and Kurt would miss their talks. Unless he invited Blaine for a coffee sometime… but wouldn’t it be awkward?

It was then that Kurt realized he was stalling because he didn’t want to say goodbye.

It was a rare thing for him, not knowing what to say. Kurt Hummel could deal with a full audience, the press, the paparazzi… and he didn’t know how to say ‘hey, it was great, see you around, have a great life’ to a guy? A great guy, but someone he had practically just met.  
Still, it was someone whose friendship Kurt wanted to keep.

“So…” he said again, wondering if he should shake Blaine’s hand or what. They’d had become sort of friends, but Kurt wasn’t used to initiate physical contact to anyone. ‘Unless it was for sex, and he definitely didn’t think about Blaine that way’, he thought. Besides, he felt like a simple handshake was too impersonal, cold and he didn’t want Blaine to get the ‘distant diva’ vibe from him.

Blaine put an end to his dilemma though, when he grabbed Kurt’s hand and suddenly his eyes were all light up again. “Hey, you’re coming on Monday for the party, aren’t you?”

“Party?”

“Yep, they’ll be back on Monday morning and we all said that no matter what the results would be, we’d meet at the choir room by six PM to celebrate.” 

“Oh!” And Kurt’s heart felt lighter than before just knowing he wouldn’t have to say goodbye to his new friend today. “Sure… I’ll be there.”

“Great! That’s… that’s great,” Blaine said, not moving, and for a second their eyes met, like testing the waters, like ‘I’m glad I’ll get to see you again’. 

Only then Kurt realized that Blaine still hadn’t let go of his hand. He looked at their joined hands, mesmerized at how good they looked together – Blaine’s tanned skin contrasting with Kurt’s pale one – and he asked himself why he didn’t want to take his hand off Blaine’s. He asked himself what he was doing here, in McKinley High’s auditorium, holding a younger man’s hand and feeling awkward and unsure of what to do like a silly teenager. And why it didn’t seem to matter.

Blaine’s eyes followed Kurt’s and only then he seemed to notice he still had the artist’s hand in his. He gave a soft “oh,” and released Kurt’s hand, laughing softly. “Sorry,” he murmured. And to Kurt’s utter amazement, he blushed.

“I…should be going.” Kurt said, “It’s getting late and I promised my father I’d be home for the Friday night dinner, it’s a family tradition.”

“Right,” Blaine said, looking at the floor and seeming to nod to himself. “Right, sure, family traditions are… important. You don’t wanna be late for that, sure.”

“Okay, then…” Kurt started, but didn’t finish because crap, he just wanted to call Burt, say he couldn’t go home now, and spend the whole night talking to Blaine.

“You’re sure you’ll be able to be here on Monday though, right?” Blaine said casually, but Kurt could read in his demeanor that he wanted him to come. 

“I am. Cross my heart,” Kurt said, blinking once, and taking a step back away from Blaine. “Goodbye,” he finally said.

“Bye, Kurt.” Blaine smiled as always. “Have a great time with your family and a great weekend.”

\--

The Friday night dinner was great. The rest of the weekend sucked. With nothing to do but sleep, watch TV and talk to Burt and Carol – Finn had gone back to Columbus on Sunday morning – he was bored. Again.

He wished, several times, that he had asked for Blaine’s number so he could call the guy and ask him to go get a coffee or something. Just to talk. It was just that…Blaine was intelligent; talking to him was interesting and challenging. Like Kurt’s friends from New York. Well, not all of them, Kurt knew some were rather shallow and only talked about themselves. But anyway, he just wanted to do something fun, and Blaine’s company was the most fun thing Kurt could think of at the moment.

He even went to The Lime Bean on Saturday. And twice on Sunday. But Blaine wasn’t there; none of the times. Oh well, he would see Blaine on Monday, right? But the weekend still sucked, and there was nothing Kurt could do to change it. 

So, when Monday – finally – came, Kurt thought about calling Mr. Schue, but he didn’t. The man was probably recovering from jetlag. Besides, what if they’d lost? In that case, it would be better to go there and give them his support personally, and if they’d won… well, it would be more fun to hear it directly from them. So, Kurt tried to occupy himself the whole day; he rearranged the pictures over the mantelpiece three times, read Vogue, helped Carole with the dishes, baked cinnamon cookies… he even called his manager, Annie, just to ask ‘what’s up’. The day passed so slowly that Kurt actually thought his watch was broken.

At six he was parking his car in front of McKinley and as soon as he got inside the school, still in the corridor towards the choir room, he knew they’d won. There was laughter, incessant talking, music and so much noise that it could only be made by a bunch of extremely happy teenagers.

“Kurt!” Blaine was the first one he saw when he stepped in the choir room. “First place, Kurt! First place! Can you believe that?” he stopped in front of Kurt, grinning like mad. “Hey guys, look who’s here!” he shouted to the kids.

Then Kurt saw himself surrounded by happy, screaming teenagers and everything was ‘we won’ and ‘thank you for everything’, and even though Kurt didn’t like people surrounding him like that, he didn’t feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable. These kids didn’t want anything from him; they were just saying thanks, even if Kurt had done so little for them that it almost hadn’t counted. 

“Hey, hey, okay guys, let him breathe,” Blaine pulled his arm, taking him from the crowd. He took Kurt to a table near the piano and put a glass in his hand, saying “don’t worry, it’s just sparkling cider”. He turned and looked at the teenagers, still jumping excitedly like three year olds. “They are really something, aren’t they? Sorry if they were too much.”

Kurt shrugged. “It’s to be expected. And I don’t mind. They’re young, they’re happy, let them enjoy. It’s not like they’re a bunch of crazy paparazzi following me around.”

Blaine frowned and pursed his lips a little. “That must suck.”

“You have no idea,” Kurt agreed. “But everything has a downside, and I’ve learned to deal with that, mostly. I just don’t feel at ease when people I don’t know come too…close. I hate being grabbed and treated like a ‘public thing’. You have no idea how many clothes I’ve had ruined by… overexcited fans. They sure like to touch artists a lot.”

“God, it must be…” Blaine started to say, but then his eyes went huge suddenly. “Shit, I do that all the time, don’t I? I just grabbed your arm, and the other day I was holding your hand and I –“ he blushed really hard, almost like a tomato. “I’m sorry, Kurt, I didn’t mean to. I get  
carried away sometimes – well, mort of the time – because…”

“Relax,” Kurt put his own hand on Blaine’s arm, trying to send the message that it was all right. “I know we’ve known each other for less than two weeks, but I’ve already realized that this is just the way you are, Blaine. It doesn’t bother me. Really, I swear it doesn’t.”

“Oh, crap, now I feel really stupid,” Blaine blushed even harder.

“I said I don’t like when people I don’t know come too close, remember? But I know you, so… it’s alright.”

“Still, I’m sorry,” Blaine murmured over the music and the noise. Then he said louder. ”I know, I’m used to touching people all the time, it’s as natural to me as talking, you know? I’m aware some people don’t like that."

Kurt just smiled, reassuringly.

Blaine went on. “It’s just that… most of the time, I forget you’re famous, ‘cause you’re not stuck up like most stars. Not that I know any stars,” he laughed, “But you being here in McKinley with the glee club… it’s so easy to see you like one of… of us. You’re a nice person, Kurt.”

Kurt felt a pang at hearing that, because that first day he’d come almost against his will, only so Mr. Schue would stop talking about the glee club. And how many times in the first day had he wished he hadn’t agreed to help them? Yes, Kurt Hummel was stuck up and hated when people invaded his personal space. He hated that he had to go to parties he didn’t enjoy with people he didn’t like, just for the sake of ‘being seen’. Like his manager always said, ‘if you’re not seen, you’re not remembered’.

“If that’s the way you see me Blaine, I’m glad. I’m also relieved that you’ve never seen me in New York. I’m… a little different when I’m there.”

“I guess it comes with the job, right?” Blaine scrunched his nose. “Having to keep a public façade must be hard and tiring… but I guess it’s like they say, ‘when we’re home we can be ourselves’, right? Well, you’re home, so can be yourself all you want here with us,” Blaine said.  
“Come on, let’s go see the trophy.”

\--

Later, Blaine got caught by the kids by the piano, playing while they sang from the top of their lungs. Somehow, Kurt ended in Emma’s office alone with her to put New Directions’ new picture in the ‘Hall of Fame’. It was just an album, in fact, with pictures of New Directions along the years, starting from 2009, when Mr. Schue decided that McKinley needed a glee club.

And there he was, Kurt’s boyish features and round baby face, smiling at the camera with Mercedes, Rachel, Finn and all the others. The first kids brave enough to form a glee club in a place where being different was like having a neon sign written “slush me”. When you liked singing, dancing and acting at McKinley, you were an outcast, you were at the bottom of the social pyramid, and no matter if you had talent or not, you were a loser.

Even so, Kurt smiled looking at the picture, feeling a strangely nostalgia for what he considered the most troubling times of his whole life. As he turned the pages, he saw more of himself, as the years passed – and his hairstyle progressed. And there was their first Nationals trophy, in 2012. All of them smiling brightly, feeling at the top of the world. Particularly Kurt and Rachel, with their admissions to NYADA already secured and already feeling like the stars they would be one day.

Out of curiosity, Kurt continued to turn the pages; all of them with smiling teenagers and their trophies, all with Mr. Schue smiling proudly with ‘his’ kids. Then Kurt saw a picture of the 2016 class. “This is the Year New Directions won again, right?” he asked, and Emma nodded beside him, smiling slightly. Kurt smiled too, looking at the happy faces, at the big trophy, at what seemed to be a newly decorated choir room. He was about to turn the page again, when a familiar face caught his eye.

“Is that… is that Blaine?” Kurt frowned, looking at the picture again, this time closer. The guy smiling shyly in the picture was dressed only in jeans and a plain white t-shirt, and his hair was so gelled that it looked almost like a helmet. But there was no mistaking the hazel-golden  
eyes, the triangular eyebrows and the strong jaw. Although the guy in the picture looked nothing like the Blaine Kurt knew, there was no doubt it was him.

“Blaine’s high school was McKinley? He was in New Directions?” Kurt asked, frowning. “I didn’t know…why didn’t he tell me he won Nationals, too?” It seemed such a natural topic to talk about, since they had been working with the glee club all week... Kurt remembered the various times Blaine mentioned the 2012 winners, always saying how great they had been, how he’d seen them on Youtube several times. It would have been only logical that Blaine would’ve mention that he, too, had been a winner in 2016. So, why hadn’t he?

Beside Kurt, Emma seemed paralyzed. Her huge, doe eyes looking at Kurt, almost pleading, for what he had no idea.

“Kurt…” she started, and he had the distinct feeling that she wanted to say something but didn’t know how. “Why don’t we go back and join the others?” she finally said with an awkward smile.

“Emma…,” he looked at her with the best bitchy face he could muster at the moment. “What is going on here? This is Blaine. Isn’t it?” 

She sighed. ”Yes, it’s him. But Kurt, I beg you, don’t talk to Blaine about this.”

“Why?” he asked, incredulously. “He loves the glee club! He works here, for crying out loud! Why wouldn’t he want to talk about it?”

“Kurt, it’s not my place to tell you,” Emma said with a sad expression. “I can’t, I’m sorry. But I’m asking you to not talk about this with Blaine. Please, Kurt.”

“But I don’t understand…”

“I know you don’t, and I wish I could tell you, but it’s too personal and… I love Blaine, I’ve known him since he was fourteen; I would never betray the trust he put in me.”

Kurt nodded slowly, still completely lost. He looked at the picture again, at the 2016 Blaine that seemed to have so little to do with the 2022 one. The Blaine Kurt knew had such a nice demeanor; he seemed happy, open, easy to read and to be with, bursting with energy all the time. He wore colorful clothes that often didn’t mix, never let go of his music sheets and books, and seemed to live for music and helping people. The teenager in the picture seemed guarded; there was a shadow in his eyes that Kurt didn’t see now, and the guy wore clothes that could only be considered an attempt to make him the most invisible as possible.

Not to mention the awful, gelled hair. 

Whatever had happened, it couldn’t have been that bad, right? Because Blaine seemed so much happier and at ease with himself now.

“Alright,” Kurt sighed. “I won’t say a word. But is he… is he alright?” 

Emma smiled softly. “He is now.” She got up to go and he started to follow her, but then she stopped. “It’s something very personal Kurt, so if Blaine… if he wants to open up to you, he will. You’re friends.”

“I’m not sure we’re really friends, Emma. I mean, we barely know each other.”

“Well, do you want you to be friends?”

There was not even a hint of doubt in Kurt’s mind. “Yes, I do. I could use a good, normal friend for a change.” ‘Someone who sees me as me, not the guy from Broadway’, he thought.

“Then come with me to the Community Centre on Wednesday,” she said.

“What?”

“On Wednesday,” she repeated. “To the Community Centre where Blaine works. You’ll see why he’s so passionate about what he does, and you’ll get to know a little more about him.”

“Alright,” Kurt agreed. “I hope Blaine doesn’t mind to see me there.”


	3. Chapter 3

Blaine was very enthusiastic about Kurt was going to the Centre. “I would take you there myself,” he said, “but I have to be there early in the morning. It’s great that you’re going with Emma. This way you can go home anytime you want, or if things get too… overwhelming.”

“Why would they be overwhelming?” Seriously, what the hell? What could be overwhelming about working with music?

It wasn’t easy work. At all. In fact, it must be very hard, because Blaine worked with children with cognitive disabilities, learning and motor difficulties and also social and emotional problems. He worked with a team of psychologists and two other guys, Nick and Jeff, who were   
about to finish their bachelor’s degrees and volunteered at the Centre.

“Oh, my Merlin,” Kurt breathed, as he saw almost ten noisy children around twelve years old calm down as soon as Blaine started to play.

“Hello, guys,” he greeted cheerily, as he played the first notes in the piano. “It’s a sunny day outside, so let’s sing together to celebrate this beautiful morning, okay?”

Everyone quieted and sat down, looking expectantly at him, as he started to sing.  _“Good mornin', good mornin'! We've danced the whole night through, good mornin', good mornin' to you!“_  (<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNqUHiv_ekg>)

The children started to clap their hands, bright smiles on their faces, and after the first part Blaine encouraged them to sing, so they did. There were completely out of key or rhythm or any order, but so enthusiastic that Kurt realized he was smiling and tapping his foot to the rhythm of the song.

Beside him, Emma whispered. “It’s the therapist’s job to create an atmosphere and environment that encourages the children to actively participate. Blaine’s great at that. You have no idea how much these children have changed since he got here.”

Kurt nodded, looking at the group. Nick, a guy with black hair, was sitting along with Jeff, a tall blond, right in the middle of the children. They clapped hands and sang along with them, making hand movements that the children imitated. The song changed to something softer, and as Blaine sang  _‘Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high…’_ , Kurt noticed how focused he was on the children, even though he was playing. He was completely in tune with their needs and responses, and adjusted sessions accordingly, communicating with the two other guys with only a glance. ([http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXJ2Q0F8H80&feature=fvst](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXJ2Q0F8H80&feature=fvst))

“Music listening and singing along are always part of the sessions, and the children love it. Sometimes they give them percussion instruments to improvise, to help them create a sense of rhythm,” Emma added.

“Do you work with them, too?” Kurt wanted to know.

“Oh, no, no.” Emma smiled. “I help the women in the kitchen, preparing the meals and sometimes I help them sew and mend donated clothes. But I come here as often as I can. I love to see the sessions. It’s inspiring. Makes me want to be a better person, to help more.”

“It really is,” Kurt breathed.

They stayed like that, observing Blaine, Nick and Jeff, as one class finished and another began, more children coming inside the room when the first ones left. These were younger and quieter, but they all reacted to the music in one way or another, but always positively. There were some that didn’t want to participate, but no one forced them, and the atmosphere in the room didn’t tense once, because the three guys were really focused in the children’s needs.

They got a break in the middle of the morning. Nick and Jeff said goodbye, claiming they had to study for a test and walked away, hand in hand. Kurt didn’t even get surprised that no one at the Centre batted an eye at the fact that they were boyfriends. Ohio hadn’t changed to the point of accepting gay marriage yet, but apparently a lot of things had changed while Kurt was in New York.

“I only have one more class with the older ones before lunch,” Blaine said, giving Kurt a cup of coffee in the break room. “They’re really great kids and we’re rehearsing a number,” he laughed. “There’s going to be a benefit in a couple of months so we can raise money for a real choir room. I want them to participate, singing. Let’s see if I can make that happen.”

“I’m sure you can,” Kurt said. 

“This is the group that’s easier to work with,” Blaine said. “Some have speech disorders, some are hyperactive, but they all had been treated before, so they have a better response to the sessions. Some have actually great voices.”

“So you’re trying to form your own glee club?” Kurt teased.

Blaine shrugged, scrunching his nose a little. “They’ll never compete, of course, but I think that it would give them a sense of…belonging to something bigger, you know? It would surely improve their self-esteem.”

Kurt nodded, smiling at how passionate Blaine sounded speaking about the kids. He wondered if he still sounded so in love with Broadway like Blaine sounded in love with his job.

“Look, you can go with Emma, if you want.” Blaine said.“ I don’t want to take your time or make you spend your vacation here. I know it must be boring.”

“On the contrary,” Kurt said. “It was amazing. I confess I had no idea what a music therapist did and it’s… like Emma said, it’s inspiring.”

“Well, you should know, since you’re an inspiration to so many people, Kurt. And I sincerely mean it.”

Kurt shook his head. “I don’t mean like that. Singing to an audience is completely different from this. This is… the way music helps these people overcome their problems, it’s... I don’t know… it’s beautiful.”

Blaine nodded, proudly. “I know. They’re so brave, Kurt,” he went on, his eyes shining with excitement. “In the afternoons I have individual sessions with the ones not ready yet to be in groups. Cases of emotional or behavior disorders, traumas, things like that. And what amazes me the most is that they never give up. None of them want to stop the sessions, and seeing the way music can reach them is… I don’t know how to explain,” he shrugged again. “Music has always meant a lot to me, and it’s great that I can help people using what I love the most.”

“Can I watch your next class?” Kurt asked. “I won’t be in the way, I promise.”

“I’d be honored,” Blaine said. “Then maybe we could have lunch together? I promise I’ll leave you alone after that.”

“Like you said, I’m on vacation,” Kurt smiled. “Spending time with a friend is a great way to have fun.”

Blaine’s smile turned even brighter at that.

\-- 

Blaine asked the teenagers if it was alright if Kurt watched the session. One or two seemed to recognize him, but they just smiled and said there was no problem. The session went normally, like the previous ones, but at the end they sang “Dust in the Wind”, the number they’d been practicing. It was great, they were actually fairly good. Kurt was impressed at the way they seemed to open up to everything around them when they started to sing. The quiet and distracted ones seemed to pay more attention; the hyperactive ones calmed and stayed more focused. It was easy to see why Blaine wanted to make a glee club here; they were good together. (<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EuJfjxyFdM0>)

“Do you mind if we stop at my place?” Blaine asked when they were leaving the Centre. “I need to pick some music sheets I forgot this morning.”

“Sure, where’s your car?” Kurt asked, assuming he would take a ride with Blaine, since he had gone to the Centre with Emma – and she had already left. 

“Um… don’t have one,” Blaine grimaced. “But I can take you on my bike.”

The “bike” was a red motorcycle that seemed a little old. “I bought it when I was still in college,” Blaine explained. “Never thought about buying a car, since it’s just me.” 

Kurt had never ridden a motorcycle in his whole life, but he wasn’t about to chicken out. He pretended his heart wasn’t racing – he was an actor, after all – and smiled at Blaine, climbing behind him awkwardly.

“I’m really sorry, Kurt,” Blaine said, turning the ignition on. “It didn’t even occur to me to ask Emma to wait for you.”

“Blaine, it’s okay,” Kurt assured him, even though he was apprehensive. What if he fell? What if Blaine sped too much and Kurt made a fool of himself by looking scared?

Blaine didn’t speed. The ride was actually nice, the wind blowing in Kurt’s face and hair. It wasn’t too hot today, despite the sun, and now Kurt knew where Blaine healthy tanned face came from.

The wind did other things to Kurt, besides putting his carefully combed hair in disarray: it brought Blaine’s scent right into Kurt’s face. The hair would need to be dealt with as soon as possible, of course, because Kurt was anal about it: it had to be perfect, always. But the scent assaulting Kurt’s nostrils made him ignore everything else: Blaine smelled clean, even after a whole morning working. There was a faint scent of sweat, of course, mixed with some cologne Kurt couldn’t identify, and there was also Blaine, a fresh smell, like a sunny morning, like the first rays of sunshine. 

It was intoxicating.

And just like that, Kurt realized he was attracted to Blaine. As in, more than just friends. There was something about him that left Kurt breathless. He had some kind of hidden charm that seemed to pull Kurt to him. Blaine had everything Kurt liked in a guy: he was handsome, intelligent and didn’t throw himself at Kurt’s feet in eternal devotion. He acted normally around Kurt, and that alone was something incredibly important to the Broadway star.

Which, of course, led to the sad conclusion that nothing would ever happen between them.

Kurt lived in New York and would be going back there soon. Blaine seemed to be the Schuesters’ protégé. He had a simple, but apparently fulfilling life, one that Kurt would never want to mess with. He didn’t want to ruin their friendship with a summer fling. He genuinely liked the guy, and he wanted to be able to come to Lima on his next vacation and see him again. It was good to have a friend in his hometown, and Kurt realized he cared too much about Blaine to hit on him and leave him after a short time. Things would be awkward, and when Kurt came to Lima again, of course Blaine wouldn’t want to see him.

“Here we are,” said Blaine, turning his head to Kurt and wow, their faces were really close now. ”It’s not much, but it’s home.”

Blaine lived near the Lima Bean, so Kurt expected him to live in one of the numerous condos around the coffee shop. But he was himself in front of a tiny white house, with a red roof and – unbelievable – a white picket fence.

“Percival, I’m home!” Blaine yelled and the golden retriever came running from behind the house. Blaine petted him affectionately. “Say hello to Kurt,” he said to the dog, and it seemed like Percival understood, because he turned his head in Kurt’s direction and gave him a single bark.

“Come in, Kurt. I hope you don’t mind the mess.”

There was nothing messy inside, at least in the small living room. Everything seemed to be white, with a touch of color here and there. Lots of pictures decorated every available surface: Blaine with the Schuesters, Blaine with Nick and Jeff, Blaine with lots and lots of children, teenagers and the New Direction kids, Blaine with Percival.

There wasn’t a single picture of Blaine and a family member, at least, none that Kurt could see.

“Um… where’s your bathroom?” Kurt asked. “I need to fix this,” he pointed to his hair.

“Uh.” Blaine looked around. “There’s no mirror in the bathroom, I never got to fix it when the cabinet broke. But there’s one in my room, the first door on the left.”

Kurt didn’t feel comfortable going into Blaine’s room like that, and the guy apparently sensed his discomfort.

“It’s alright, Kurt. Make yourself at home. I’m staying here; I can’t find the sheets I’m looking for anywhere.”

The house was really small: a tiny living room/office, a tiny bathroom, a tiny kitchen and an even tinier bedroom. But everything was tidy and clean. Kurt wondered about how much time Blaine actually spent at home, he seemed to be a bit of a workaholic.

Blaine’s bedroom consisted of a bed, a small wardrobe and a vanity. Kurt smiled at the moisturizers he found there, and the amount of hair product – none of them hair gel, though – and the numerous, colorful bow ties hanging from small hangers on the wall.  
He looked at himself in the mirror, frowning at how hideous his hair looked. Looking around, he didn’t find a comb or a brush, so he opened the first drawer and froze.

There was a picture inside it. Blaine and another man were smiling, hugging each other. Blaine’s hair was gelled and he looked like the same Blaine from the 2016 picture at Emma’s album. The man was taller than Blaine, handsome, blue-eyed. They were smiling openly at the camera and seemed happy to be together. Kurt picked up the photo and turned it, curiosity impossible to control. In a messy handwriting, he read  _‘I love you, little brother, even if you’ve forgotten it, I haven’t forgotten you, and I never will. Cooper.’_

Wow. Did Blaine have a fight with his family, and that’s why they live on opposite sides of the country? Blaine, who seemed so adorable and easily likable, who seemed so sincere and genuine? What was written on the picture made it look like Blaine didn’t want to talk to his brother on purpose. That seemed like a pretty huge fight. 

“Kurt?” Blaine called from the living room.

“Yes, I’m coming!” Kurt hurriedly put the picture in its place and looked around wildly for a brush. He found it on the bedside table, grabbed it and hurriedly rearranged his hair.

Blaine looked at him apologetically when he returned. “I’m sorry, but Percival needs to go outside and I have a session at two. If we’re having lunch, we’d better leave now.”

“Do you eat at the Lima Bean every day?” Kurt asked casually, “because there are other places nearby that we could go.”

Blaine clearly looked uncomfortable at the offer, but he hurriedly masked it with a frown. “Um, I... I’m not sure dogs are allowed in other places, and I … have lunch at the Lima Bean every day, and it’s just…can we go there, please?”

“Oookay,” Kurt smiled, “no problem, I love the Lima Bean, I was just wondering if you never get tired of eating the same thing; I bet you’ve experienced the whole menu by now.”

Blaine shrugged, opening the front door and putting a leash on his dog. “I’m a man of habit.”

“You don’t seem very predictable to me,” Kurt said, because if there was anything Blaine wasn’t, it was monotonous. 

They ate outside, as always. Kurt opted for a salad while Blaine chose a huge sandwich – and he kept surreptitiously throwing pieces of it to Percival. They ended up talking about Blaine’s work again, and Kurt marveled at how he didn’t seem to get tired of hearing Blaine talk about his work. For the first time in years, the main topic of Kurt Hummel’s conversation wasn’t himself or his work and he welcomed the change.

Not that he didn’t want to talk about Broadway, he did. But suddenly, theatres, plays and auditions weren’t the most interesting subject in the world. Not when Blaine’s hazel/yellow eyes shone so much as he explained how music was able to reach people and take them out of their shell.

Later, they stood at the front of Kurt’s house, Blaine still on the motorcycle and Kurt in front of him. 

“I have to go,” Blaine said, almost pouting, “my next session starts in twenty minutes.”

“Okay,” Kurt answered. He searched his mind for something to say, some way he could tell Blaine that he wanted to see him again. They were friends, right? And friends spent time together. He stood there while Blaine turned on the motorcycle’s ignition, but before Blaine could go anywhere, Kurt, on an impulse, took a step towards him, one of his hands on Blaine’s shoulders. “Can I have your number? We could have lunch again sometime, and I’d like to go to the Centre again, if that’s alright with you.”

“Really?” Blaine gave Kurt one of his huge smiles. “You’d like to go back?”

Kurt shrugged, trying to sound casual and already asking himself what was he doing, but unable to stop. “I’m on vacation; I’m tired of staying home, bored out of my mind. Maybe I could help with something? Maybe I could volunteer?”

Blaine looked at him in awe. “Kurt, you’re such a nice person!” he said, admiration clear in his eyes. “We don’t have many volunteers there.”

“I could… help you with the benefit? I’m great with planning events. I planned my father’s wedding when I was sixteen.”

“That would be awesome,” Blaine said, and added more softly, “It’s very generous of you.”

Kurt felt a little guilty, because his reasons weren’t exactly about the children. But hey, he would get to spend time with his friend and he would help people, right? Win-win situation. “Your number?” he reminded Blaine.

“Oh, right!” He told Kurt the number and as he turned the motorcycle to go, he sent Kurt a playful wink.

Damn. Blaine was cute. And Kurt would have to resist him. And now he had just gotten himself into volunteering at the Community Centre. It was going to be a long summer. Damn, indeed. 

\--

“You sure seem to be spending more time out this summer,” Burt commented one day at breakfast. “You usually sleep the whole morning and spend the rest of the day watching DVDs and complaining about how bored you are.”

“Mmm?” Kurt said distractedly, as he added sugar to his tea.

Burt went on. “Honestly, I never thought you liked McKinley so much. You seemed to hate the place when you were in high school.”

“I’m not going to the school anymore,” Kurt, now paying attention, told his father casually. 

“And where do you go every morning? I’ve never seen you waking up so early, and we’ve rarely had breakfast together in all the times you came home.”

“I was waking up late because I’m entitled to have my beauty sleep, Dad. I need it, because I can’t look this fabulous if I’m tired.”

“I see.” Burt sipped his coffee and raised his eyebrows. “But it’s eight in the morning, Kurt. Today is Thursday, and we’ve been having breakfast together for three days now. So let me rephrase my question: why the hell are you getting up so early on your vacation and where are you spending the whole morning?”

“I go to the, um… Community Centre.”

Burt almost choked. “Where?”

“The Community Centre, Dad,” Kurt said, rolling his eyes. “Surely you don’t mind me volunteering there?”

“Of course I don’t mind, but who are you? Where’s my son?” Burt laughed, shaking his head.

“I’m helping a friend with fundraising. It’s no big deal.”

“A friend?” Burt frowned. “None of your friends in Lima ever volunteered for anything.”

Kurt rolled his eyes again. “A new friend, Dad. He works there as a music therapist. We’re working on a benefit to raise money for a music room for the Centre.”

Burn looked at Kurt suspiciously, with a hint of amusement in his eyes.

Kurt’s phone buzzed, and he looked at the message, smiling. “Bye, Dad, he’s outside.”

“He’s coming to pick you up? Why don’t you tell him to come in so I can meet him?”

“We don’t have time now, Dad!” Kurt put his mug I the sink and grabbed his wallet and keys. “The first class starts at nine!” 

Burt got up hurriedly and when Kurt opened the door he was just behind him. There was no way he would miss the old red motorcycle right in front of his house and the young man that smiled and waved at him like they already knew each other.

“You’re going on that?” Burt whispered, tugging at Kurt’s arm before Kurt could escape. But he waved back at the man anyway.

“Later, Dad,” Kurt said, “I have to go! Bye!” He ran to Blaine and jumped on the motorcycle behind him, arms encircling Blaine’s waist for balance.

“Bye, Mr. Hummel!” Blaine shouted, and soon they were gone, completely missing Burt’s amused expression and the glint in his eyes. 

Kurt looked happy. In Lima. Burt was curious to know more about the man who seemed to be responsible for such a change.

TBC

  


 


	4. Chapter 4

As the weeks passed, Kurt started to get more involved with the Centre’s activities.  
  
It was funny how well and fast he’d adapted. Of course his help was received with open arms, and if anyone thought strange that a famous person was there helping them – or if anyone thought he was doing this just to look good to the media – no one said anything. Even so, Kurt decided to keep a low profile, spending most of his time there with Emma or Blaine, but Blaine had his sessions and Kurt didn’t want to interfere.  
  
Blaine, as always, was nice to everyone. If Kurt could describe him with one word, it would be exactly that one: nice. He always greeted everyone, showing interest in everything they said. He always had a friendly word for his co-workers and so far, Kurt hadn’t seen him snap at anyone, not even when he looked stressed after a particular session. The most amazing thing was that the way Blaine acted seemed to be completely genuine and Kurt had never seen someone so selfless like that. Was this guy even real? -  
  
After a few days at the Centre, Kurt and Emma started to organize the fundraiser, sending invitations, helping with the pamphlets, the costumes, everything they could. The music room wasn’t just for Blaine’s classes, of course. The Community Centre offered violin and piano lessons as well. So, every single student would get to perform, except for the small kids and the ones Blaine considered prone to get nervous or stressed in front of an audience.  
  
The numbers performed were simple, the place they’d gotten for the show – an old theatre downtown – was small, but everyone was engaged and positive it would work.   
  
Blaine continued to work with his kids, with the help of Nick and Jeff and together they kept working on the songs the children were used to singing: Good Morning and Somewhere Over the Rainbow. There was no pressure, the sessions went on normally and only the ones who understood what was happening and really wanted to participate would sing, but Blaine, Jeff and Nick would be on the stage with them.   
  
Most of the teenagers, though, were eager to be part of the show. With Nick and Jeff at Uni in the afternoons, Kurt started to help Blaine and soon the group was singing Dust in The Wind and These Small Hours (Little Wonders) with Blaine at the piano and helping with the vocals. (<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_1ZmLHfFWs>)  
  
Kurt liked the time he spent at the Centre. It was something so different than what he was used to doing during his vacation time, and although he was waking up early almost every day, he didn’t feel tired at all.   
  
He also didn’t mind working alongside people he didn’t know. Everyone was focused on the fundraiser, and so far no one had treated Kurt differently, even though some had asked for him to sign a Playbill or two. He did it willingly; these were nice people and they neither crossed the normal boundaries nor treated him differently. It was a good change.  
  
But the most interesting of all were the changes that were happening inside Kurt.  
  
For the first time in a very, very long time, Kurt was working hard for something that wasn’t for him, but for others. He was doing something for other people without getting anything in return. It was strange how good it felt to know that he was not only entertaining people in a full theatre, but helping to build something that would make a difference in their lives. It made Kurt feel part of something bigger than himself and his dreams. The music room would be there forever, and Kurt would always know that the kids would have a proper place for their sessions in a room he had helped building – even if his help was so small, when compared to Blaine’s or Emma’s help.  
  
Helping, only for the sake of helping, was something he had never done, and it made him feel good like only a few things had in his whole life.  
  
The other change was Blaine.  
  
Sometimes their eyes would meet across the room and Kurt could swear there was something there. Some connection he couldn’t explain and yes, that was a cheesy thing to think, but it was true. Sometimes he would keep staring, just to see what Blaine would do, but the younger man would lower his eyes after a short time with a flustered smile and pretend nothing was going on.   
  
When they were close to each other it was the same thing: little touches of shoulders when walking together, a casual brush of hands here and there. It could mean something but it could also mean nothing at all. Sometimes, when they were talking, Blaine would grab Kurt’s arm or squeeze Kurt’s hand in the way Blaine always did with everyone, but Kurt could swear he was able to feel an electric current every single time that happened.  
  
Kurt was starting to fall for the guy. More than physical attraction, Kurt was starting to like him in a completely non-platonic way. Crap, he was already into this more than he thought was prudent. He wanted to be close to Blaine all the time. Something pulled him to Blaine, and Kurt didn’t know what to do with it.   
  
Hell, he didn’t know what was going on with him anymore. He wanted Blaine around and he started to think what it would be like to kiss him. Then the rational side of him would tell him to not even think about it, because this couldn’t go anywhere since their lives were so different and far from each other.  
  
It didn’t help that Blaine continued picking him up every morning with his motorcycle and Kurt had to hold Blaine’s waist tightly and stay very close to him and feel the way he smelled and how toned his muscles seemed to be under his clothes and –   
  
Crap.  
  
But it only got worse when one Saturday afternoon he came home from the mall and found Blaine sitting with Burt on his porch, talking animatedly while Percival ran happily on the Hummel’s backyard.  
  
“Kurt, hey!” Blaine greeted. “I came to show you the final program for the show, but you weren’t home.”  
  
“And I invited him to stay and wait for you,” Burt finished.  
  
Blaine looked at him sheepishly. “I could have called first… but I wanted to surprise you. I hope I’m not intruding – “  
  
“Of course not, don’t be silly!” Kurt smiled at Blaine and sent a warning glare at Burt. ‘Please, Dad, don’t interfere in this’, Kurt meant with his eyes, and he was sure Burt understood, judging by the amused way he looked at his son.  
  
But it didn’t work. Burt invited Blaine to stay for dinner, which Blaine promptly accepted, and Kurt couldn’t say no or he would hurt the guy. The smile Blaine sent his way was so disarming that Kurt caught himself smiling back while he cringed on the inside. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Blaine to stay: it was that he really, really wanted him to stay. That would only complicate things even more. He was really trying to remain only Blaine’s friend.  
  
If Blaine had ever read any gossip that painted Kurt as a Don Juan, aka a sexual predator, he never gave any indication. Blaine didn’t seem the type to read crap, and it had just been one note implying that he changed boyfriends like he changed clothes. As far from the truth as this was, it was still written in the damn tabloids and Kurt didn’t even want to think about it. He didn’t want to know if Blaine knew, or if someone who knew he was Blaine’s friend knew and had told Blaine and now Blaine knew –   
  
Complicated, indeed.  
  
Dinner was so strangely domestic that Kurt blinked several times trying to wake up, but it was no dream. The curly haired dreamboat was sitting at the dinner table charming Carole with compliments to her cooking and discussing football with Burt. He ate slowly and politely, and when they started to talk about the fundraising show, he got excited like a little boy talking about a new toy. Kurt looked at Blaine talking with his parents, amazed at how well they interacted. It looked like he was part of the family.  
  
It was cute.  
  
Shit. Kurt was in deep, deep trouble.  
  
“Thank you, Kurt,” Blaine said on the porch, with a sweet smile on his face, “See you tomorrow at the show?”  
  
“Of course,” Kurt nodded. “You want me to go to the theatre earlier with you?”  
  
“I know we’ve taken so much of your time already, but…”  
  
“Don’t worry about it. It’s been great to be able to help. Pick me up at four, then?” The show would start at seven, so Kurt would have plenty of time to help Emma.  
  
“Will do.” Blaine looked at Kurt for a moment then lowered his eyes. “Your folks are great. I had a good time tonight.”   
  
“You charmed them, you know,” Kurt raised an eyebrow. “Now they will keep asking me to invite you.”  
  
Blaine smiled sheepishly, and his eyes locked with Kurt’s for a few seconds; enough to send an electric jolt through Kurt’s body. They were so close, it would be so easy to cross the few centimeters separating them, lean down and kiss Blaine like he’d been wanting to for a couple   
of weeks now. They kept staring at each other, the seconds going by with none of them moving an inch. Kurt felt paralyzed, afraid to break the spell, lost in the hazel pools of Blaine’s eyes.  
  
Then Blaine suddenly blinked, as if waking up from a dream, shaking his head slightly. “It’s great to have you as a friend, Kurt. See you tomorrow.”  
  
Blaine almost ran to his motorcycle, and when he turned on the ignition, he waved at Kurt and was gone, just like that, in a blur of movement. Kurt kept looking until the motorcycle was only a red dot with the realization that he’d just had been ‘friend zoned’. If that was exactly what Kurt believed to be the right thing, why there was something heavy in Kurt’s heart?   
  
\--  
  
Sunday was a hot day. The trees barely moved; there seemed to be no wind in all of Lima. Kurt hated the heat, but as Blaine’s motorcycle ran towards the theatre, Kurt could feel the wind on his face again – he was getting addicted to the feeling – and it almost felt like flying.   
The streets were empty, so Blaine could go a little faster than usual.  
  
Kurt could feel how excited and nervous Blaine was. He wanted the fundraising show to be a success, he wanted the kids to sing their songs, he wanted people to donate enough so they would be able to build the music room. Most of all, he just wanted the parents to come and see how far their kids had progressed and how important it was to keep fighting for them.  
  
The little side note in the newspaper that morning saying that Kurt Hummel, the Broadway star, would be supporting the show and the Community Centre took Kurt by surprise. Annie, Kurt’s manager, just wanted to help, to make people go to the theatre. Kurt was sure about that. But he didn’t want the focus taken from the kids, from Blaine, Nick and Jeff, and all the others who had worked so hard for the show to happen. The night was about them. Not about Kurt. So, he watched the show from backstage.  
  
He also contributed with a big check, in Annie’s name, of course.  
  
The good thing was the theatre was packed.  
  
The show was a success. A couple of children gave up at the last minute due to stress, but the rest was wonderful. The violinists brought the house down, and the guy at the piano was really great. Blaine’s numbers with his kids came next, and it was great how Blaine and his   
co-workers kept them calm in front of the audience. The teenagers’ songs were the last number and they totally rocked, singing along with Blaine, who was also playing.  
  
Kurt lost count at how many parents approached Blaine to thank him after the show. He kept watching from backstage as Blaine shook so many hands that, in the end, he sat by Kurt’s side in the green room completely exhausted.   
  
“Wow. I deserve at least a week of vacation now. Pity it’s not gonna happen.”  
  
“You gonna work tomorrow?” Kurt asked, frowning. It was already late.  
  
“No, of course not. The Centre will be closed tomorrow; Mr. Greene needs to count the money we made, and everybody is tired today. But on Tuesday morning, here we go again.”  
  
“Who’s Mr. Greene?”  
  
“My boss,” Blaine explained. “I swear, Kurt, the guy has a big heart but he always looks so grumpy that it makes me sad just to look at him,” he joked. “I’ve never seen him smile so much like he did today.”  
  
Kurt chuckled and they stayed there, side by side, in comfortable silence for a while. Emma and Will came to say goodbye, as did Nick and Jeff. Kurt knew it was time for them to go home too, but it felt so good to be with Blaine so close to him that he didn’t move.  
  
“You want me to take you home?” Blaine blurted out. “You came with me, after all.”  
  
“Yes, please,” Kurt answered, trying not to sound disappointed.  
  
Blaine stood up and took Kurt’s hand, guiding him to the parking lot though the theatre’s back door. Kurt was feeling really tired, and he knew Blaine was practically dead on his feet. Part of him was sad the show was over because he wouldn’t get to see Blaine every day   
anymore. But hey, they were friends, and Kurt was comfortable enough with him by now to ask him to hang out sometime. He still had a month before he had to go back to The Big Apple.   
  
He didn’t notice that Blaine only let go of his hand when they got close to the motorcycle.  
  
When they got to Kurt’s house, it was late. Save for the faint light on the porch and the lights from the streetlamps, everything was dusky and quiet. They climbed off of the motorcycle in silence. Blaine went up the steps to the porch with Kurt, stopping in front of his door.  
  
“I have no words to thank you enough,” he said quietly. “Your help was really important, Kurt.”  
  
Kurt rolled his eyes. “I didn’t do anything; you guys did all the work!” He took one step closer to Blaine and took one of his hands. “I am the one who should thank you. You let me help and I had no idea how great it would make me feel.”  
  
Blaine chuckled and held Kurt’s other hand in a way that now they were facing each other, close enough to feel each other’s warmth.   
  
“Why did you watch the show from backstage?” Blaine wanted to know.  
  
“Um…” Kurt blushed, even though Blaine couldn’t see. “I may have told my manager about the show and today there was a small note in the newspaper saying I would attend it. The show was about you guys and the wonderful work you do, so I…”  
  
“You hid,” Blaine finished for him. “Oh, Kurt, you didn’t have to.”  
  
“Yes, I did. It would make this about me, and it really wasn’t. People would have gone there to see a famous person – most of them don’t even know who I am.“  
  
“Well, for what it’s worth, we had a full house tonight,” Blaine snorted.  
  
“That’s the only reason I’m not going to strangle her. I swear, sometimes I think she doesn’t know me. I would hate it if someone thought I was helping just to look good, just for publicity. I would hate it if you thought that.”  
  
Blaine shook his head vehemently. “I would never think that about you.”  
  
”I… watching you perform with those kids… it was beautiful, Blaine.” Kurt shrugged. “I just wanted everyone to see how great you are with them, how important your work is to their lives.”  
  
Blaine hugged Kurt so tight that for a moment Kurt lost his breath. “Thank you,” he said, his face hidden in the crook of Kurt’s neck.  
  
Kurt wasn’t expecting that. The onslaught of contact made his heart start beating so fast that he thought it would stop from fatigue any minute now. Blaine’s arms were around his shoulders and Kurt slowly raised his own arms to rest on Blaine’s waist. Blaine felt so good against   
him that he never wanted to move again.  
  
The wild beating of his heart told Kurt how affected he was by having Blaine so close to him. And it was just a hug. He wasn’t used to being affected like that. He had always been the calm and collected one in all of his relationships. ‘And this is not a relationship’, he reminded   
himself. But here he was, on his front step, feeling like a teenager after his first date, hoping the guy he had a huge crush on would turn his head and kiss him.  
  
And that was exactly what Blaine did. “You’re wonderful, Kurt,” Blaine whispered, and he touched Kurt’s lips with his own in a light kiss. For a few seconds they stood like that, holding each other, mouths touching but not moving, just breathing and feeling the other’s proximity.   
It was the most innocent kiss Kurt had ever experienced, and yet, it felt like heaven.  
  
Suddenly, they were kissing for real, tongues and teeth and grabby hands, right on Kurt’s front step. It was everything Kurt had ever imagined a kiss could be – and he had kissed many, many guys by now. It was perfect, and all thoughts left Kurt’s mind leaving just a blurry   
mess of feelings, and Blaine so close and so real, his warm and soft mouth against Kurt’s. He never wanted it to end.  
  
But it ended soon, too soon, and Blaine was stepping away from him with huge eyes, mouth open and an expression that made Kurt’s heart sink. He looked like he regretted kissing Kurt.   
  
“Oh my God, Kurt, I’m sorry!” he said, taking another step away from Kurt.  
  
“Blaine, wait!” Kurt tried to get closer, but Blaine went further away. “Can – can we talk about it?”  
  
“I shouldn’t - Kurt, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t know what – please, forgive me.”  
  
“Blaine.” Kurt said, starting to get desperate because Blaine was babbling and he looked so sorry, why did he look so sorry, like they’d just done something wrong? “It’s okay,” he said, trying to put his thoughts in order in a way that wouldn’t drive Blaine further away from him.  
  
“No, it’s not. I… I overstepped, I… our friendship, I took advantage of it and… “  
  
“Blaine, I wanted this to happen,” Kurt said more loudly, hoping that it would make Blaine understand and stop freaking out. “I’ve been wanting this for weeks, Blaine.”  
  
“No, you can’t, Kurt. I – we can’t. I have nothing to give you,” Blaine whispered, seeming terrified.   
  
“I don’t want you to give me anything, just…Okay, I admit it’s not going to be easy, but… I really like you, Blaine.”  
  
“No, no, this is a mistake,” Blaine shook his head. “I’m sorry, I – I need to go.”  
  
“Please, stay!” Kurt tried to grab Blaine’s hand, but the guy just pulled it away.  
  
“Kurt, you’re wonderful,” he said, sounding defeated. “You have a life in New York, you’re famous, talented, and on top of that, you’re wonderful on the inside.” Blaine shook his head again, this time looking at the floor between them, avoiding Kurt’s eyes. “And that’s why I   
can’t drag you into the mess I am. Please, I… I’m sorry, I need to go, I… bye, Kurt.”  
  
“Blaine, wait!” Kurt shouted, but he was already climbing on his motorcycle and he was gone before Kurt could do anything to stop him.  
  
Kurt touched his lips, still puffy from Blaine’s kisses. He could still smell Blaine, could still feel his arms around his shoulders, hands on the back of his neck. Kissing Blaine had felt right, like no one that had ever been in Kurt’s arms had felt before.  
  
It was hard to believe that he’d been so sure about being only Blaine’s friend. How had everything changed with just a kiss? How could everything change for Kurt just like that?   
  
There was no way Kurt wasn’t going after him. There was no way.  
  
TBC


	5. Chapter 5

“Blaine!” Kurt knocked at Blaine’s door for the umpteenth time that morning. “Blaine, please, open the door!”

Kurt could hear Percival barking inside Blaine’s house. He had tried to call earlier, but it had gone straight to voicemail. He was confused about Blaine’s reaction, tired because he hadn’t slept at all, but most of all, he just wanted to see Blaine and know he was alright. 

“Fine,” he shouted, not caring that there were people on the street and that some of them were giving him really odd looks. “You don’t want to open the door, don’t open it. But you can’t stay hidden forever; you’ll have to leave sooner or later. And I’ll be here, waiting.”

Percival barked again, and this time Kurt heard a different sound, a muffled ‘shit, shut up, Percival’, and then a thump. Before he had time to start knocking again he heard a noise, a key being turned and the door opened a fraction.

“You’re going to get sunburned if you stay there. You’re too white.”

Kurt could only see half of Blaine’s face and Percival trying to escape outside through the narrow space between Blaine’s leg and the door. “All the more reason for you to let me in,” he said, attempting a small smile.

“Kurt, I don’t think it’s… look, it’s better if we just… Please, Kurt.”

“Please, Blaine,” Kurt shot right back, in a soft tone. “I think we need to talk. Don’t you?”

“Can’t we just… forget it?”

Kurt sighed. “If that’s what you want… if you regret it so much…” he shrugged, sure his expression showed the sadness he was feeling at Blaine’s words. 

“It’s not like that, Kurt,” Blaine said, and suddenly the door was completely open and he was looking at Kurt with huge, hazel eyes. Percival took the opportunity to escape to the front yard. 

“Then what’s it like, Blaine?”

“You think I regret that we… kissed.”

“You’re acting like you do; what do you want me to think?” Kurt opened his arms and dropped them in a helpless gesture. “It’s okay, I just… I just wanna know why you ran like that, so please, can we start acting like adults and talk about it?” 

Blaine took a deep, resigned breath and stepped aside. “Come in,” he said, sounding defeated.

Kurt walked inside and looked at Blaine. His curly hair was even wilder, he hadn’t shaved and his eyes looked red and tired, as if he hadn’t slept for days. He was wearing dark blue sweatpants and a red AC-DC t-shirt that looked older than he was. He looked adorable, except   
for the shadow in his eyes and the hunch of his shoulders.

“You want something to drink? I have iced tea,” he said to Kurt.

“Yes, please,” Kurt answered, only now realizing how thirsty he was. He had been banging on Blaine’s door for more than an hour and it was hot as hell outside.

Blaine poured the tea into two tall glasses and gave one to Kurt, who promptly drank it. 

“Come on,” Blaine said, turning and walking towards his bedroom. Kurt followed him hesitantly and once inside, he stayed awkwardly, holding the empty glass, not knowing what to do.

“You can sit, Kurt,” Blaine gave him a tiny half-smile - the first that day, but enough to make Kurt’s heart feel lighter. “On the bed,” Blaine clarified. “There’s no other place, and we’re not gonna have this conversation with you standing.”

Kurt sat down, back straight, eyes locked on Blaine, who had his back to Kurt at the moment. He watched as Blaine took a tiny sip of his tea, put the glass on the vanity and turned to him, with a serious look that Kurt had never seen him give before.

Kurt kept looking as Blaine silently opened his wardrobe, looking for something at the bottom of it. After some time, he emerged with what seemed to be an old photo album.

“Here,” he put the album in Kurt’s lap, sitting slowly beside him but maintaining some distance so they weren’t touching. “Take a look.”

Kurt put his own glass on Blaine’s bedside table and opened the album. The first thing he saw was a baby, smiling at the camera and holding a red toy car. He had a single tooth in his mouth, hazel, happy bright eyes and a mop of curly black hair on his head. He was completely   
adorable.

“Is this you?” Kurt wanted to know.

Blaine sighed. ”This is Blaine Anderson. The real one. I’m… I’m a fraud.”

“What do you mean?” Kurt asked, flabbergasted.

“Or, if you prefer, he’s the fraud and I’m the real one.” Blaine frowned, gesturing at the album. “Come on, keep looking. My family had this album specially made for me.”

Not understanding what Blaine had meant by that, Kurt kept turning the pages. The baby in the first page was now a toddler, with curly, wild hair, dressed like an adult, with a bowtie, sitting on a beautiful woman’s lap. Then the pictures showed the boy getting progressively   
older, and now it was already possible to see the Blaine of today in the kid. The eyebrows started getting thicker, the hair wilder, the boy taller. Then, there was a picture that made Kurt stop: Blaine, standing in front of a school, a very familiar one; McKinley High, it said at the   
building’s entrance. His face was still a little round and child-like – he looked like fourteen, maybe? – but now his curls were kept in place by a lot – a lot – of gel and his clothes were plain and simple, jeans and a black t-shirt. His smile seemed forced and he held his books in front   
of him like a shield.

Kurt looked at Blaine, frowning, but Blaine seemed lost in thought, staring at the floor. He wanted to say something, to ask what did Blaine’s pictures had to do with anything, but Blaine, maybe feeling Kurt’s stare, squeezed his hand and murmured ‘Please’, and Kurt instantly   
knew that he wanted him to keep looking at the pictures.

There weren’t many more; only three or four pictures of Blaine and the glee club. There was Mr. Schue and a bunch of kids Kurt assumed to be the other glee club’s members. 

The last two pictures were on the same page. The first was exactly like the one Kurt had seen in Emma’s album: the National’s winning glee club of 2016, and there was Blaine, smiling shyly with the other winners beside the trophy. 

The last one was Blaine’s family: his father, with his hair gelled exactly like Blaine’s, serious, tall and proud; his mother, a tiny, beautiful woman with long, black wavy hair and a big smile; Blaine’s brother, tall like his father and gorgeous, with his arm around Blaine’s shoulder. And   
Blaine; short, adorable, shy Blaine, who clearly wanted to be like his dad, but was too much like his mom, looking at the camera with a slight smile and uncertain eyes.

Blaine squeezed Kurt’s hand again and started talking, so low that Kurt had to strain his ears to understand. He didn’t look at Kurt, just kept staring at the floor. His voice sounded emotionless, like he was reciting a story someone had told him.

“Blaine Anderson was born in 1998. His parents were college teachers and they lived in a comfortable house in Lima, Ohio. His big brother, Cooper, was his best friend. He was always a straight A student and he played several instruments. He loved to sing and he dreamed of   
being a musician, of moving to New York when he grew up. In high school he joined the glee club, and in his senior year, his school won Nationals with Blaine’s solo. He was also gay, but he never came out to his family.”

“Why are you talking about yourself like that?” Kurt asked softly when Blaine paused. But the younger man, whose hand hadn’t left Kurt’s, squeezed it again, silently asking Kurt to keep quiet.

“In his senior year, he met his first boyfriend, Sebastian. He was a football player and also in the closet, so they dated, but no one knew about it.” Here Blaine’s voice cracked a little, but he straightened his shoulders, determined to go on. “The night the glee club won Nationals,   
there was a party for the whole school and Sebastian went with his friends. He and Blaine sneaked to an empty classroom to make out. A couple of Sebastian’s friends saw them and Sebastian must have freaked out, because he told them that it was all Blaine’s fault, that Blaine   
had forced him. He and Blaine didn’t see each other again. On graduation day, after the ceremony, the football team found Blaine alone in the parking lot. No one knows why he was there by himself, but they took the opportunity and beat him, leaving him almost dead. He was   
found several hours later, and ended up in a coma for two weeks.”

Kurt only realized he was crying when the first tear streamed down his face. “Oh, Blaine, I’m so sorry,” he whispered. His other hand went to Blaine’s face on its own volition and he cupped it, forcing Blaine to look at him. “It must have been terrible; I’m so, so sorry,” he said,   
feeling more tears coming.

Blaine’s expression remained calm. “It doesn’t matter, Kurt,” he said with a sad smile. “I don’t remember any of it.” 

“The attack?” Kurt asked.

Blaine shook his head. “No. Any of it. My whole life. It’s all gone, and it’s never coming back.”

“W-what?” Kurt’s eyes widened.

“I can tell this story only because someone told me all these things. The first memory I have of my life is of waking up in a hospital, covered in bandages, and some people I’d never seen before were there, claiming to be my family. I didn’t know them; they asked my name and I   
couldn’t tell them, because I didn’t know.”

“Blaine…” Kurt shook his head, crying even more.

“Don’t cry…” Blaine wiped Kurt’s eyes softly with his thumb. “It’s okay; the doctors said the memories may come back one day, but it’s been six years and they haven’t, so I don’t think they will. Talking about this doesn’t hurt; it’s just a story. That’s how it feels when I talk about   
it: it’s just a story.”

Kurt hugged Blaine then because he couldn’t contain himself anymore. He needed to feel Blaine close to him and make sure he was fine. It was ridiculous, but he felt as if he needed to check Blaine’s physical integrity by himself, so his hands traveled along Blaine’s arms, torso,   
back. They stayed in a tight hug on the bed, Blaine hands stroking Kurt’s back while Kurt cried silently for Blaine’s lost memories. 

\--

Kurt woke up in Blaine’s bed with a start. He had no idea how long they’d slept. They were lying on their sides, facing each other, fully clothed – except for the shoes – arms thrown around each other, knees touching. 

He heard a soft tapping and looked around, seeing that Percival was leaving the bedroom. Apparently, the dog had been guarding their sleep and decided to go now that Kurt was awake.

Blaine was sleeping peacefully, snoring softly. Kurt ran his right hand softly through Blaine’s curls, trying to not wake him up. He remembered how after Blaine’s story, both had felt suddenly tired and had silently laid on the bed, still hugging, staring at each other. Blaine had   
murmured ‘Thank you’, and he and Kurt fell asleep without even realizing it. 

Now, as he watched Blaine waking up, Kurt felt a pang in his heart. There was so much he wanted to know about him; how hard it must have been to have no idea who he was, how his recovery time had been, and most of all, why did he live alone with a dog while the rest of   
his family lived on the other side of the country?

“Hey,” Kurt said, as Blaine blinked slowly, finally waking up. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Blaine said, smiling a little. “What time is it?”

“A little past noon.”

“Are you hungry?” Blaine asked, looking around. “Where’s Percival? Do you wanna go out to eat?”

“Whoa,” Kurt said, putting a hand on Blaine’s chest. “Slower, please,” he joked. “I can only answer one thing at a time. Yes, I’m hungry, Percival was here and just left the room and I’d rather eat here with you, if you have any decent ingredients to make us sandwiches.”

Blaine gave Kurt what appeared to be a sincere smile. “I have ham and cheese.”

“That sounds fine.” 

\--

They ate in the living room, but Blaine didn’t eat too much. Percival, used to eating Blaine’s food, waited patiently by the man’s side while Blaine threw the dog his remaining food. “He’s getting fat,” Blaine said, petting the dog and looking at him affectionately.

“You’re spoiling him,” Kurt said, giving Percival the rest of his sandwich, too. He wasn’t hungry either. 

Later, and Kurt didn’t even know how it happened, they ended up hand in hand, side by side on Blaine’s couch, the television on mute, an old episode of Project Runaway on. The silence was comfortable, and Kurt was still curious but he didn’t want to be pushy. If Blaine wanted   
to talk, he would.

“What do you want to know?” Blaine asked, after some time.

“I didn’t say anything!” Kurt protested.

“I can hear the wheels in your brain turning,” Blaine half-joked. His eyes found Kurt’s and his little smile seemed sincere. “It’s okay. What do you want to know?”

Kurt pulled Blaine a little and the younger man understood what Kurt wanted because he shifted and rearranged himself, until he was resting his head on Kurt’s lap. Kurt started to run his hands through Blaine’s hair again, noticing he was doing that a lot lately, it seemed.

“You said it’s okay to talk about what happened because it’s just a story, you don’t remember,” Kurt said, trying to organize his thoughts. “But…” he stopped, unsure if he should go on.

“But?” Blaine pressed.

“But you remember what happened after you woke up, and that’s what I want to talk about, so I’m not sure if you – “ 

“Kurt, it’s okay,” Blaine said, his hazel eyes fixed on Kurt’s face.

“Okay, then,” Kurt started hesitantly. ”Why… why do you live here alone, Blaine? Your family lives in LA, and you’re still in Lima, where everything happened? How?”

Blaine twitched his mouth a little. “We all moved to LA after what happened. Cooper was already living there and my parents decided it was a good idea to take me away from Lima.”

“And yet, here you are.”

“Here I am,” Blaine agreed. “I tried, Kurt. You have no idea how much I tried. But I didn’t know them, do you understand? I had no memory of living with them and they wanted things to be the way they were before, but I wasn’t the same. I was no one, at that point.”

“Don’t talk like that.”

“But it’s true. I had no idea where to start, how to build a life with stories that meant nothing for me. They wanted me to be the same and I just couldn’t be their perfect son anymore.”

Kurt nodded.

“It’s… interesting how the human brain works,” Blaine went on. “I had lost all my memories, but physically, I was completely okay. Not only that, but I still knew how to play all the instruments I used to play – piano, guitar, cello – and I could read music as well. Cooper had a   
friend who was a music therapist, so he thought it was a good idea to take me to a few sessions to help me get back on my feet.”

“Cooper seems like a cool guy.”

“He is,” Blaine smiled a little. “And if it weren’t for him, I would have never found out what I wanted to do with my life. As soon as I started with the sessions, I realized that was what I wanted to do. It gave me purpose, you know? To be able to help other people doing what I   
loved the most: music.”

“Mmm,” Kurt nodded again. “It’s easy to see how much you love it.”

“So, Cooper convinced my parents to send me to college and after I graduated, I came here to Lima and that’s how I found the Community Centre. Emma knew me from McKinley, so she helped me get the job.”

“But Blaine… Lima? You couldn’t have stayed in LA? Lima is, like, the most obscure place in all America.”

“You came from Lima, and there’s nothing obscure about you,” Blaine said sincerely and Kurt blushed, as cliché as it was. 

“Blaine… Lima?” Kurt asked again. “I can’t understand, I hate this place.”

“Well, two things happened in my first summer at college. First, I came out to my parents because I had no idea they didn’t know I was gay. When I asked if I could bring my boyfriend home they almost had heart attacks. Let’s say it put a huge strain on our relationship. It only   
got worse over the years. Every time I came home for summer it got worse, until I stopped going. To my father I am just this big disappointment, and my mother is pretty much controlled by him, so… if things weren’t working for us before that, you can imagine how it became   
after their messed up son informed them he was as gay as they come.”

“And your brother?”

“After I graduated, I asked Cooper to come to Lima with me; I wanted to see McKinley again. I still had some hope I would remember something, you know?”

“And you didn’t,” Kurt said sadly.

“No. But when I stepped in the choir room, it felt… familiar. My therapist – my psychologist – had said it was a good thing for me to be surrounded by familiar things; things that could make me feel at home. And strangely, the choir room and McKinley’s auditorium made me feel at   
home, even if I didn’t exactly remember them.”

“But McKinley was always so… full of homophobes, Blaine. How could you feel safe in that school, knowing what had happened, I mean, even if you didn’t remember it…”

“You’re right; I don’t remember McKinley from before. But the school where I work now has a no bullying policy, a gay-straight alliance, a theatre club, a glee club… I feel comfortable in that school. Of course there must be some homophobes, they’re everywhere…but the   
school’s policy is pretty clear: no bashing, no bullying, no violence or prejudice; if you feel like doing that, keep your feelings and thoughts to yourself.” 

“Wow. It feels like the Twilight Zone for me. McKinley was the source of most of my problems in high school.”

“Emma said that after the bashing the teachers finally decided to do something and demanded a change from the principal. Apparently they didn’t like that the school’s name was in every paper because someone almost died after graduating with straight A’s, just because the   
guy was gay.”

“Oh, Blaine.”

Blaine shrugged, head still in Kurt’s lap. “It’s alright. At least something good came out of it. Now people can be who they want without being terrified anymore.” He sighed. “Anyway, I decided to live here. Cooper bought me this house and on the same year at Christmas, he   
came with Percival. Mr. Schue offered me a job at the school and shortly after, Emma got me an appointment at the Centre and I got the job of my dreams.”

“They’re so lucky to have you,” Kurt said, hands playing with Blaine’s curls again – and was he getting addicted to it?

“I am the lucky one, Kurt,” Blaine said. “Aside from Cooper, those kids are my family.”

“I still don’t understand how you can be so… calm about it,” Kurt observed, shaking his head in disbelief. “If it were me… I’m a big drama queen, believe me.”

“It’s not that I’m calm, Kurt,” Blaine looked at Kurt, serious again. “It’s that I refuse to be a victim. The thing I hate the most is pity. I’m fully functional, healthy, with my whole like ahead of me. I wake up every morning and spend the whole day working with music, surrounded   
by people I love, in a place I feel totally at home. I talk to my brother on Skype every other day, and I have Percival to keep me company. My life is awesome.”

“Yes, it is,” Kurt agreed sincerely. Somehow, this guy that had gone through so much, had started from zero made a life for himself. He was amazed at Blaine’s courage, but especially at the joy he still had inside him, after everything. He was optimistic, something Kurt himself   
had never been. He smiled so much because he loved his life.

Kurt envied him so much. Because Kurt Hummel was an artist, lived in New York surrounded by sophisticated people, wore mostly haute couture and designer pieces, went to parties in places people would die just to get inside. Yet he didn’t feel as passionate about his life as   
Blaine did – except when he was on stage, then he felt truly alive. 

How could someone be so happy with so little?

Which led Kurt to another question: if Blaine thought his life was so awesome, why he was still alone?

After a few minutes, in which Kurt and Blaine just stared at each other, the comfortable silence stretching between them again, Kurt decided to break the spell and talk again.

“Can we talk about us, now?”

Blaine’s eyes closed. “Kurt – “

“No, Blaine, I need to talk about us. There’s something happening here and you can’t deny it.”

Blaine sat up and sighed, running his hands through his hair. “No, I can’t deny it.” He took a deep breath. “But it doesn’t mean that there can be something more than friendship between us.”

“Care to tell me why?”

“Kurt, I – “ Blaine started, but Kurt interrupted him.

“Because when we kissed I felt something I had never felt before and maybe I’m being stupid and sappy for telling you this – and believe me, saying things like that are not my style, far from it; I don’t do that, ever – but there was something there, Blaine. Was I the only one   
who felt it?” 

“I don’t know what you felt, Kurt…”Blaine said in a very low voice, “But I felt like… I could never let you go.”

“And yet you’re telling me it’s not going to work?” Kurt said, exasperatedly. 

“How could it work, Kurt?” Blaine got up and started pacing the small living room. “Look at your life; your fabulous, glamorous life in New York. You have everything. Now, look at my life. I can’t even remember who I was six years ago! It’s so… small compared to yours!”

“You said your life was awesome,” Kurt snapped.

“It is!” Blaine insisted. ”For me, Kurt. _Me_. I can’t fool myself thinking that I would ever be able to keep your interest long enough to have a real relationship. Sooner or later you’d get tired of me because I do the same things every day and all I talk about is my job and my kids.”

“Agh!” Kurt said, shaking his head. 

“I have nothing to give you, Kurt. All I have is what I’ve been building since the attack. It’s all I have. There are things about me that not even I know, and sometimes my life is just this big mess that came from nowhere and I don’t, I can’t drag anyone into this. But you – you’re   
a star, Kurt! You live in New York; I live with New Directions. There’s a big difference here and I can’t believe you’re not seeing it.”

Kurt got up as well. “Do you think I’m that shallow, Blaine? Just because of what I do or where I live, you think all I care about is my ‘fabulous, glamorous’ life?” 

“Of course not. You’re perfect,” Blaine answered.

Kurt snapped, losing his patience. “But not good enough for you.”

“It’s exactly the opposite! I am the one who – “

“I think I can decide for myself what’s good for me and what isn’t, Blaine. Thank you for your concern, but I am a big boy,” Kurt said icily, because that was how Kurt Hummel reacted whenever something could penetrate his walls deep enough to cause him pain. He acted with   
coldness, so no one could see how hurt he was. And this man, this young, silly, stupid, stubborn, wonderful man had done just that: he’d gotten under Kurt’s skin and now he was telling him he’d have to let him go.

“Kurt, I’m sorry if I – “

“I felt attracted to you as soon as I saw you, did you know that?” Kurt said, in the same icy tone. “ I thought we would only work as friends and the more time I spent with you, the more I started to care about our friendship. I didn’t want to spoil it with physical attraction.”

“I felt attraction too,” Blaine said in a tiny voice. “How could I not?”

Kurt pretended he hadn’t heard. “I’ve been fighting with this for weeks: the attraction that grew into friendship that grew into something more. But you were the one who took the first step; you kissed me first, and now you tell me it was a mistake?”

Blaine pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, but remained silent.

“You know the first thing I liked about you, Blaine?” Kurt asked, this time in a bitter tone. He didn’t wait for Blaine’s answer. “The fact that you treated me like a normal person from the start; the fact that you seemed to be able to see through the fame and the gossip and   
everything that makes me famous. I thought you could see me. Kurt. But you can’t.”

Blaine’s eyes widened, in alarm. “No, Kurt, I can! I can see you and that’s why I can’t mess with your life!”

“You can’t,” Kurt insisted vehemently. “You’re just like everyone else. All you can see is how wonderful my life is and how happy I must be.” He was sarcastic now. “You forget that I have feelings that I want to keep private, I want things for myself that I don’t want to share with the public. You forget I’m just a guy.”

“Kurt, no, it’s not like that,” Blaine said, pleading.

“Well, that’s exactly how it feels from where I’m standing. We can’t even try to be together because you’re so simple compared to the ‘oh so sophisticated’ me, all we can ever be is friends. Never mind that you made me care about you, really care, but hey, that’s alright   
because I can return to my wonderful life and forget all about you in seconds, right?”

Blaine didn’t answer this time; he kept staring at the floor, breathing hard, as if he were trying to control unwanted tears.

Kurt shook his head sadly and walked towards the door. “I’m out of here.”

“No, Kurt… please,” Blaine walked in Kurt’s direction, but Kurt extended his arm in a ‘stop’ gesture. 

“If you don’t feel anything for me, that’s okay, I can live with that. But if you feel the way I feel and you’re using the fact that I’m famous as an excuse to hide how scared you are to start something new in your life... well, all I can say is that it’s a pity, Blaine. You seemed…   
braver.”

“I feel something, Kurt! I care about you in a way that’s more than friendship, I do! But – “

“But nothing.” Kurt stopped Blaine from talking. “I’m sorry, I have to go. I can’t deal with this right now,” Kurt opened the door angrily and before Blaine could stop him he was on the street, almost running. He could hear Blaine’s voice calling him, but he just had to go. He   
crossed the street and soon he was near the Lima Bean, where he got inside the first cab he saw, getting as far from Blaine Anderson as he could.

 

TBC  
  


 


	6. Chapter 6

It had been one kiss. Well, more than one, but still. How could Kurt have fallen so hard for someone with one kiss? It didn’t make sense; of all the guys Kurt had made out with, Blaine had – hell, they hadn’t even made out properly! How on Earth was t possible that Kurt was   
already considering Blaine’s kiss the best kiss he had received in his life?   
  
It didn’t make sense.  
  
Kurt was not like this.  
  
Only, apparently he was now. Part of him wanted to go back to Blaine’s house, grab him by the shoulders and shake him until some sense would get inside Blaine’s stubborn head. The other part wanted to go to Blaine’s house, grab him by the shoulders and kiss him until there   
was nothing else in the world.  
  
As the cab took him home, Kurt was a mixture of angry, sad and frustrated. He asked himself what the hell had happened to him; where was the guy so many called “the cold diva.”   
  
Burt was home and, as always, he had a word for Kurt whenever he needed some advice. Carole had gone to the mall with a friend and before Kurt knew it, he was spilling everything to his father, both men sitting on the front porch. Kurt didn’t need to ask Burt to keep   
everything between them; Burt was his best friend and Kurt knew he would never repeat what Kurt was telling him to anyone.   
  
“You told him you’re just a guy,” Burt repeated, and Kurt nodded. “And that he only sees you like a famous person, like everyone else.”  
  
“That’s the way it feels, Dad. I thought it was different, but it seems that all he sees – all that everyone sees when they look at me – is the Broadway artist. I wonder when anyone will start looking for the real me under Kurt Hummel?”  
  
“You are Kurt Hummel, son,” Burt said, patiently.  
  
“You know what I mean, Dad,” Kurt deadpanned. “I mean, I come here, fall for a guy in Lima of all places, and what happens? He says I’m too perfect and he’s too undeserving of me, and he’ll drag me into a mess and yadda yadda yadda. It sounds like a bunch of excuses,   
that’s how it sounds!”  
  
“Are you done ranting?” Burt asked.  
  
Kurt rolled his eyes. “Yeah.”  
  
“Then cut the poor guy some slack, Kurt,” Burt said, looking pointedly at Kurt.  
  
“Excuse me?” Kurt blinked. “You think I’m forcing myself on him?”   
  
“Of course not, kid. But let me tell you, it’s really hard to separate Kurt from Kurt Hummel. You are Kurt Hummel, and there’s a big poster with your face in Times Square. Think about how hard it must be for Blaine to have the man everyone wants – don’t contradict me- it doesn’t   
look like I do but I know things, Kurt.”   
  
Kurt rolled his eyes again. “Right, Dad.”   
  
“Now, where was I? Oh, yes, the guy must be terrified. He thinks he’ll never be enough because you have everything and he as nothing, and how on Earth he will ever be your equal? “   
  
“Dad, we’re not getting married,” Kurt snapped. “It’s not that serious, for Merlin’s sake! We’re, I mean we were starting something, that’s all it ever was.”  
  
“Oh, yeah?” Burt snorted. “How come he was the first guy you ever brought here?”   
  
“You invited him, in case you’ve forgotten.”   
  
“I did it because your eyes were shining when you were looking at the guy, Kurt. And so were his. Both of you looked at each other like your mother and I used to look at each other. And it took me less than a minute of seeing you together to notice.”  
  
“Come on, Dad,” Kurt gave him a forced laugh.  
  
Burt arched his eyebrows. “I’m not talking about eternal love here, son. You’ve known him for what, a couple of months? I’m being realistic and telling you that you need to put yourself in that guy’s place. If you and him get together – you, every gay man’s dream boat – when   
the media finds out his life will be scrutinized, and soon everyone will know about the poor boy who was bashed and had his memories beaten out of him.”   
  
“I don’t think he thought about that.”   
  
“Just because you didn’t think about that, it doesn’t mean he didn’t. People will want to know what you see in him, he will be followed, photographed, and everyone will know that six years ago he had no idea who he was. It was in the papers everywhere. I remember when it   
happened.”   
  
“You do?”  
  
“Yes, and I admit that I felt relieved it hadn’t happened to you.”   
  
“Shit. What do I do, Dad?”   
  
“I can’t tell you what to do. Besides, you always end up doing what you want. So, go to sleep. Think about it. If you really want to start something with this guy, start with small steps. You’ve never been the type who gives up, so I don’t think you’re gonna start now.”  
  
\--   
  
That night, Kurt gave into temptation and looked for the New Directions’ performances from 2013 to 2016 on Youtube. During the first two years it was hard to find Blaine. He was always in the background, swaying with the others and adding ‘oooohs’ and ‘aaaahs’ while the soloist sang at the center of the stage.   
  
During the last two years, he apparently was made soloist and… wow.  
  
The Blaine singing on the stage was completely different from the shy boy with gelled hair that never smiled completely in the pictures. When he was performing, Blaine was another person. He came alive. Not only he was good, with a strong yet silky and melodious voice, but   
there was an energy that seemed to come from inside the boy, something that made him shine. He captivated the audience easily, danced like a pro and sang like perfectly, every note seeming to come from his very core. Eyes closed, he seemed lost in the song, in a world   
where nothing mattered, only the music he loved so much.  
  
That was exactly how Kurt felt whenever he was singing on stage: like everyone and everything else didn’t matter, only him and the music.  
  
The last video was when the New Directions won Nationals, in 2016. The theme had apparently been ‘Classic Rock’ and Blaine killed the audience with ‘Stairway to Heaven’, ‘Go Your Own Way’ and ‘I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing’. They got a standing ovation. Blaine’s eyes were   
shining with happiness and when Mr. Schue was given the trophy, he let Blaine hold it. Kurt could almost feel how elated the boy was.  
  
It wasn’t hard to understand why he had wanted to be a musician.  
  
It was hard to imagine that only a few weeks later all these wonderful memories would be lost to Blaine forever.  
  
Kurt turned off his laptop and got up from his chair, feeling suddenly tired and heavy. He got on the bed and stared at his cell phone for several minutes before making up his mind.  
  
“ _Blaine?_ ” he texted.  
  
The answer came faster than Kurt expected. “ _I’m here_.”   
  
“ _I still want to be your friend_.” Kurt texted fast, before he could give up.  
  
This time the answer took a bit longer. ” _Come to the Centre tomorrow_?”  
  
“ _Okay. Goodnight, Blaine_.”  
  
“ _Good night, Kurt_.”  
  
\--  
  
“How long before I get in, before it starts, before I begin, How long before you decide, before I know what it feels like…”   
  
Blaine had his back to the door when Kurt arrived at the break room. He was playing an old song on his guitar and singing softly, only to himself. Kurt didn’t want to intrude, so he stayed there until the song ended.  
  
“Hey, there,” he said finally, taking a hesitant step inside the room.  
  
Blaine got up fast, the guitar forgotten on the couch. “You came,” he said, as if he had doubted it.  
  
“Yeah.” All the things Kurt had thought of saying to Blaine vanished from his head just like that.  
  
“You said…” Blaine started, taking a deep breath. “Are we still friends? Can- can you forgive the stupid things I said?”  
  
Kurt smiled softly. “Even though I disagree with you, I understand where you’re coming from. I’m sorry if I pushed too much. I think that… we can start with baby steps and see where it goes from there. If you want to.”  
  
“God, yes,” Blaine let out a breath he’d been holding. “I don’t want to lose you, Kurt,” Blaine’s eyes were huge, shining with emotion. “You’re going away in a month and the mere thought that I may not see you again… it scares the shit out of me.”  
  
This time it was Kurt who initiated the hug. He held Blaine tight resting his chin on Blaine’s shoulder, feeling Blaine’s arms around him just as tight.  
  
“I promise,” Kurt whispered in Blaine’s ear, “I’m never saying goodbye to you. Not really.”  
  
\--   
  
The new routine wasn’t different from before. Blaine still worked until four. Kurt still went to the Centre in the afternoons and helped Emma and the others with whatever they needed while he waited for Blaine. Then, sometimes they went to Kurt’s house and watched TV on the   
sofa, after eating one of Carole’s famous diners. Other times, they went to Blaine’s house and stayed curled around each other on the sofa, talking about anything and everything. It was completely platonic.   
  
It was driving Kurt crazy.  
  
Only now that Jeff and Nick had graduated and were promptly hired by the Community Centre, Blaine could have a day off here and there.   
  
His first day off Blaine and Kurt spent in an old music shop called ‘Between The Sheets’, going through every old Broadway song they could find; mostly songs from the 30’s and the 40’s. They shared a love for old, classic songs and for Judy Garland. Blaine was crazy about her.   
Later they went back to Blaine’s house, where they played and sang every single song until their throats hurt.  
  
The following week they had lunch at a place called Breadstix. Kurt was impressed that place was still standing; he’d gone there with Rachel countless times when he lived in Lima. Blaine had never gone there – not that he remembered, anyway – and he and Kurt dissected the   
menu, analyzing everything critically. They shared a salad, both had lasagna, and Kurt ate so much cheesecake that he thought he would explode. They took some lasagna home to Percival.  
  
The third week, Kurt and Blaine went to Westerville on Blaine’s motorcycle. Blaine wanted Kurt to see Dalton, an old school that had wanted to hire him as a music teacher. The place was too formal, and he and Kurt agreed it would never have worked. Blaine loved his colorful   
clothes and at Dalton he would have to wear an ugly blazer and look like an old man. They spent the afternoon in the park having sandwiches under an old oak, and it was late when they decide to go back to Lima. Kurt got sunburned, Blaine applied aloe lotion on his face while   
Kurt bitched about the wrinkles.  
  
The fourth week – the last week before Kurt would have to go to New York – they spent in Blaine’s house. It was Wednesday, and Kurt was leaving on Friday. Kurt had brought one of Carole’s pies, but they hadn’t eaten too much. There were long silences that day; long stares   
that seemed to last forever. Both knew that in a couple of days Kurt would be gone and everything would change, even if they’d had decided to keep in contact.  
  
On Wednesday night, after Blaine left Kurt on his doorstep with a hug and an ‘I’ll see you tomorrow’, Kurt’s heart started to ache. There wouldn’t be many more ‘tomorrows’ for them.  
  
\--  
  
Friday came, and with it, the moment Kurt had to go back to New York. He was going back to the play in a week, so he needed to be there earlier to rehearse even though he could play the part with his eyes closed.  
  
US Airways had a non-stop flight that left Dayton at 4:05 PM and two hours later he would be in LaGuardia. Kurt had decided to leave Ohio in the morning, because he hated not being on time. He’d learned that arriving fashionably late was not always the best option when   
someone had to audition for a play – or for a part on anything theatre-related ,. He had gotten used to always being on time over the years knowing, of course, that no plane would wait for him.  
  
He and Blaine hadn’t seen each other too much on Thursday, because Blaine had to work and Kurt had to pack. Burt invited Blaine for dinner that night, so he and Kurt had a little more time together.  
  
Dinner was mostly silent, save for Burt and Carole trying to make small talk here and there. Neither Kurt nor Blaine was up for talking. They weren’t up for eating, too, but Burt and Carole didn’t say anything. As soon as Carole finished doing the dishes she and Burt went   
upstairs claiming to be tired. Kurt was grateful that he and Blaine would at least have some privacy to say goodbye.  
  
The problem was how they were going to say goodbye when neither man wanted to? They stayed on the porch, hand in hand, looking at each other for a long time.  
  
“We have Skype,” Kurt said.  
  
“And emails,” Blaine ended for him.  
  
They knew it wouldn’t be the same thing. How many friendships seemed stronger than anything until distance, routine and day-to-day obligations pulled the friends apart?  
  
“I’ll be here for Christmas,” Kurt tried to smile, unsuccessfully. “But if you’re going to LA to see your parents, we can – “  
  
“I’m not,” Blaine shook his head vehemently, and then shrugged. “Last Christmas I spent at the Community Centre; we served dinner for homeless people then I sang for them. I didn’t feel like going to LA; my home is here.”  
  
Kurt nodded. “I’ll come then, and we can… spend some time together…?”  
  
“I’m going to count the days,” Blaine said softly. “Give me a hug?” he asked.  
  
The hug lasted for a long time, neither man wanting to let go. Kurt wasted to ask for a kiss, but he didn’t dare; it would only make it harder to leave.  
  
“It was wonderful meeting you, Kurt Hummel,” Blaine whispered, and Kurt could hear his breath hitching, trying not to cry. “Spending time with you was a privilege I’ll treasure forever.”  
  
“Don’t make this sound like a goodbye, Blaine,” Kurt whispered, his own tears on the verge of falling. “Please.”  
  
They still couldn’t let go, but eventually they had to.   
  
“Will you text me when you get in New York?” Blaine almost pleaded. “So I’ll know you’re alright?”  
  
Kurt nodded again. “Okay.”  
  
“I guess it’s time for me to go then,” Blaine murmured, looking at the floor.  
  
Kurt took a deep breath. “I’m going inside, okay?” he said, holding Blaine’s hand. “I don’t want to – I – I can’t watch you leave. Not tonight.”  
  
“Alright.” Blaine took a step towards Kurt and kissed him softly on the cheek. Kurt closed his eyes, the first tear falling, finally. “Bye, Kurt,” Blaine said.  
  
Kurt whispered a choked ‘bye’ and went inside his house as fast as he could. Once inside, he stayed quiet, listening while Blaine’s steps sounded farther away until the motorcycle was turned on and the noise started to grow fainter.   
  
Kurt hugged himself, crying openly now. He had never cried over a friend like this. He had never allowed someone to get so close like Blaine had, and now his heart felt broken just because he didn’t know when he would see his friend again. It was surreal; if someone had told   
Kurt Hummel that he would be feeling like that because he was returning to New York, he would have laughed.  
  
The truth was that Blaine wasn’t just a friend. There had always been something different about him, an invisible push that Kurt, always so hard to open up to people, hadn’t been able to resist. Kurt wanted Blaine; he wanted him close all the time like he’d never wanted anyone   
else in his life. The more he realized that, the more he cried. He had never cried over a guy before. Kurt Hummel had finally fallen in love - and it hurt like hell.  
  
\--  
  
Kurt’s puffy and red eyes were hidden behind his sunglasses when he left the cab that had taken him from Lima to Dayton. He was used to going to Dayton like that; he didn’t want Burt to drive all the way back home by himself. His father wasn’t getting any younger and Kurt   
would spare him every time he could.   
  
There were a couple of hours until his departure, so after his check-in Kurt found a café that wasn’t too crowded and ordered a non-fat mocha. He sat on the farthest table available, wanting to be left alone. He didn’t take off his sunglasses because he looked awful after   
spending the whole night awake, sometimes crying, sometimes trying not to cry. He hoped no one would recognize him.  
  
He tried to read a book but he couldn’t concentrate. All he could think of was how wrong people were when they said it was wonderful to fall in love. Kurt felt terrible. Drained. He never wanted to fall for anyone ever again. All he wanted was to get inside his New York   
apartment, lock the door behind him and sleep for a week.  
  
“ _US Airways, flight 3032, to New York. All passengers, now boarding at gate 10_.”   
  
‘Finally,’ Kurt thought, feeling relieved to know that soon he would be home and would be able to be left in peace and drown in self-pity until the next day. Maybe eating a huge bowl of chocolate chip ice cream and watching an old musical - just like in all the romantic comedies   
out there. Only this one didn’t have a happy ending; shit, it hadn’t even started properly. So why the hell was Kurt feeling so sad?   
  
He sighed. It was time to go. Kurt got up, threw the remains of his coffee in the closest trash can and grabbed his bag.  
  
“Kurt!” he heard, among the noise of people coming and going. He closed his eyes, hoping there was another Kurt around.  
  
“Kurt!” the voice called again, and Kurt started walking faster; the gate was close and maybe they would let him board first.  
  
This was just great, he thought with sarcasm. Now, apparently, someone had recognized him and he would have to smile because he was always nice with his fans. Oh shit, he didn’t want to take any pictures; he wasn’t taking his sunglasses off, no way. He kept his back to whoever had called him. Maybe if he ignored them the person would go away? Maybe he could pretend that he just looked like Kurt Hummel? He really wasn’t in the mood.  
  
“Kurt, come on! Look at me!” Kurt heard, and this time the voice was a lot closer and more desperate, and then there was a hand grabbing his arm and turning him around.  
  
 _Oh._  
  
“Blaine?” Kurt murmured dumbly, because Blaine was the last person in the world he expected to see here.  
  
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Blaine started babbling, while his strong hands grabbed Kurt’s shoulders, almost shaking him. “But I had to tell you, I had to.”   
  
“Tell me?” Kurt asked, because his head was feeling fuzzy. Blaine was here. Blaine.  
  
“I love you, Kurt. Oh, my God, I love you and I was so stupid; I can’t believe how idiotic I was for not telling you this before. I couldn’t let you go without knowing, Kurt. I love you. I’m so, so, sorry. Everything I said was bullshit, I don’t know what I was thinking, I love you and we wasted a whole month because I’m stupid and stubborn and – “  
  
“Shut up, Blaine,” Kurt cut him sharply, his brain finally starting to work properly. “You are an idiot.”  
  
“I know,” Blaine said, his face crumpling, “I know, and I’m sorry. But you had to know.”  
  
“Now that I’m about to leave?” Kurt shook his head in disbelief. “ _Now_ you tell me? Really?”   
  
“I know,” Blaine repeated. “But – “  
  
“But nothing.” Kurt threw his arms around Blaine’s neck. ”Shut up and kiss me. You’re the most infuriating man I’ve ever knew but I love you, too.”  
  
“You do?” Blaine’s eyes went huge, his mouth fell open in disbelief, but he tightened his hold on Kurt’s shoulders.  
  
“I do.” And Kurt finally, finally kissed Blaine right there, in the middle of Dayton’s airport, not giving a shit about who could see them. The world had suddenly turned into a wonderful, bright place, and Blaine was the center of it.  
  
TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Inside Blaine’s bedroom everything was quiet except for the two men staring at each other with their hands entwined and breathing softly. Blaine was so close that Kurt could feel when the puffs of hot breath left his mouth. He smelled of coffee and peppermint and Kurt wanted to kiss him so bad it hurt.  
  
Closing the space between them, Kurt met Blaine’s lips softly at first but soon it was all lips and tongues and teeth. The way Blaine kissed made Kurt’s head spin, and soon there was nothing else inside his head but Blaine, Blaine, Blaine.  
  
No one was paying attention to the lack of finesse with which they removed their clothes and dropped them unceremoniously on the floor. All Kurt could concentrate on was that Blaine was teasing his lower lip, pulling him closer, pressing their now naked bodies together. It felt   
so overwhelmingly good that Kurt let out a soft whimper.  
  
“Kurt?” Blaine’s voice was only a soft whisper, barely heard among the heavy breathing.  
  
“I want you so much, Blaine,” Kurt panted. “So much it hurts.”  
  
“You have me,” Blaine answered between kisses, his tongue sliding alongside Kurt’s and oh, how could someone taste so good?   
  
Kurt put his arms around Blaine’s waist and started pushing him backwards until the back of Blaine’s knees hit the bed. He looked at the younger man, once more wanting to know if it was alright to be here because he didn’t believe he could back off now. Blaine stared at him with unabashed lust and wonder, leaving Kurt breathless. When Blaine smiled at him in that boyish way only he had, Kurt started to lower Blaine slowly onto the bed following him closely, their chests always touching.  
  
He hovered over Blaine for a few seconds, taking him in. He already looked disheveled with a thin layer of sweat on his brow, and the way his deep, hazel eyes looked at Kurt- like he was everything that mattered in the whole world- was making Kurt crazy. He tasted Blaine’s lips again, this time in a slow and deep kiss and the way Blaine clutched at his shoulders, pushing him to get even closer, made Kurt’s stomach do flip-flops and his heart pound inside his chest like crazy.  
  
“What is this you’re doing to me, Blaine Anderson?” Kurt murmured in wonderment, arching his neck so Blaine could kiss his collarbone.  
  
“I love you,” Blaine simply answered, while he tangled both hands in Kurt’s hair and pulled him down a little so he could nib his earlobe.   
  
“I love you, too,” Kurt said sincerely, and the fact that he had never said this to anyone was overwhelming. This was what being in love felt like and it was finally happening to him. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world, having the man he loved in his arms, being able to   
feel his heart beating so close to his own, being able to see his eyes shining and his lips smiling; knowing he had caused that. Blaine was a guy that smiled a lot, and Kurt could write a whole book about his smiles alone. The smile he was giving Kurt now was different: not so wide,   
but combined with the intensity in Blaine’s eyes it spoke of secrets not yet told, of love and happiness and a little mischief too. It felt intimate; a smile reserved for Kurt’s eyes only.  
  
“Kurt,” Blaine whispered. “I want – I want – “  
  
“What, Blaine? Tell me.”   
  
“I want you. Please, Kurt…”  
  
Kurt didn’t have an answer to that. Something inside him broke, like he was letting any remaining resistance just… go. He kissed Blaine hard, with all he had, grunting when Blaine’s legs opened to nestle Kurt between them. Kurt’s mouth practically attacked Blaine, not caring that the guy would surely have several marks the next day. Blaine kissed Kurt back hungrily and desperately, half-moaning, his arms thrown around Kurt’s neck, keeping him in place.  
  
Kurt would like to say that his and Blaine’s first time was slow and beautiful with soft kisses and low moans, like in the movies. But it wasn’t; it was sloppy and desperate and fast, like a storm that suddenly rolled over them and left them drenched in sweat, drunk with lust and love They clung to each other like their lives would simply end if their bodies stopped touching.  
  
It was still beautiful; beyond any words Kurt could find to express the moment. It was beautiful when Kurt was finally moving inside Blaine and Blaine arched his back whispering Kurt’s name over and over again, like a prayer, while his nails undoubtedly left scratch marks on Kurt’s back. It was beautiful when Blaine moaned louder, clenched at Kurt’s back harder and shuddered beneath Kurt. It was beautiful when Kurt’s vision turned white and he felt like he was flying, everything explosions and flashes of light inside him.  
  
It was beautiful how they curled around each other afterwards, in a messy tangle, not caring to clean themselves. Kurt, so OCD with cleaning himself right after sex, wasn’t in any hurry to take Blaine’s scent off him. He pulled the duvet over their bodies and let himself surrender to tiredness. Blaine’s head rested on his chest with his right hand over Kurt’s heart, like he was guarding the place where he belonged.  
  
\--  
  
Kurt’s PA was already on her way to pick him at the airport when he called to say he wasn’t coming that day. In fact, she went crazy when he informed her that he was coming back to New York on Tuesday. He didn’t tell her the reason, saying only that something very important had come up and he would explain everything personally.  
  
After that he called his agent, and Melanie wasn’t very pleased to know he wasn’t going to start rehearsing until Wednesday morning. Kurt had never been anything but completely professional and responsible with his work and the play wasn’t in any danger, because Kurt could play his part backwards if he had to. His agent told Kurt not to worry, that she trusted him and she would try to calm down the producers and re-schedule his appointments with Annie. She begged him not to be late on Wednesday morning or the play’s director would flip his shit and Kurt would be in deep trouble.  
  
Kurt sighed when he hung up the phone and looked at Blaine.  
  
“I have to be there on Tuesday night.”  
  
“Okay…” Blaine said with a worried tone.   
  
“Hey,” Kurt said, putting his hand on Blaine’s knee. “It’s alright. Everything will be fine. The director loves me. I’ve been playing this part for eighteen months. Two days of rehearsal before I go back to the play will be more than fine.”  
  
“I feel guilty,” Blaine said lamely, “Even though I’m beyond happy you stayed a little more. I mean, we’re – and I’m – you’re already risking too much because of me. ”  
  
“Don’t be dramatic, Blaine. You make it sound like we’re going to be arrested. It’s my choice, okay? I want to stay. I can stay; I wouldn’t be here if I couldn’t.”  
  
They were lying on the bed after taking a shower – and of course, after Blaine had changed the sheets – and after attacking Blaine’s fridge. Kurt made an omelet with everything he found that was still edible – but there wasn’t much, to tell the truth. They’d eaten in companionable silence, but soon the mood had changed to playful and Kurt had started feeding with Blaine with his fork, while sitting on his lap. The poor chair – it was really old – cracked at their combined weights, almost dropping them, so they were forced to go to bed again.   
Once there, one thing had led to another and soon they were making out like insatiable teenagers.  
  
After round two, though, neither man slept. They stayed lying on their sides, legs entwined, facing each other with stupid, dopey grins on their faces. One look at Blaine’s bedside table, where a clock showed it was almost seven, brought Kurt right back to the real world.  
  
He had called his father first, then his PA and finally his agent. While both women acted like Kurt was crazy, all Burt asked was that Kurt stopped at his house to say goodbye when he decided to go back to New York. Kurt didn’t even have to explain that Blaine had gone all the   
way to Dayton on his motorcycle just to see Kurt. They’d decided to leave it in the airport’s parking lot and rented a car so Kurt could bring his three suitcases all the way back to Lima. Burt also didn’t ask where Kurt would be staying, saying that he was glad things had worked   
between him and Blaine. Kurt loved his father.  
  
“How about you?” Kurt asked after a few minutes of comfortable silence, his hand caressing Blaine’s jaw, where stubble was starting to show. “You should have been at work this afternoon.”  
  
“I, um… I called in sick. Jeff and Nick stayed with my sessions for today.”  
  
“The whole day?” Kurt arched his eyebrows. “Wow.”  
  
“Even if I’d had time to go back for the afternoon sessions, I would be of no use at work today. Either I would be elated or destroyed after talking to you, if I could reach you in time. I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on the kids’ needs.”  
  
Kurt stifled a laugh. “I think we’re a bad influence on each other, Mr. Anderson.”  
  
“I think we’re a very good influence on each other, Mr. Hummel.”  
  
They didn’t talk about what would happen to their relationship in three days, when Kurt would have to go back. It was not a conscious decision, but they didn’t want to break the giddy mood both were in. They stayed the rest of the day in bed, talking and kissing, only stopping   
for a few minutes so Blaine could order Thai food and feed poor Percival.  
  
Saturday was no different than Friday. When Kurt woke up, Blaine’s side of the bad was empty but Kurt could hear him singing ‘Teenage Dream’ in the kitchen. Smiling, Kurt took a shower and put on a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt he found in one of Blaine’s drawers. He   
wasn’t in the mood to open his heavy suitcases now. He felt relaxed, content and a little bit lazy; he almost skipped his skin care regimen, but of course he didn’t.  
  
Kurt found Blaine in the kitchen, wearing an apron and making pancakes. He was only in his pajamas bottoms, but apparently he had already gone out and come back because the fridge was now fully stocked.  
  
“Hey, you,” Kurt hugged Blaine from behind while he flipped another pancake.  
  
“Sleep well?” Blaine asked, turning his head to the side so he could kiss Kurt’s cheek.  
  
“Like a baby,” Kurt said, “But you shouldn’t have let me sleep so late, it’s already past eleven!”  
  
“I’m an early riser,” Blaine said, “and we didn’t have anything to eat. I wanted to… to cook you breakfast,” Blaine turned his head away from Kurt a little, but Kurt was so close that he could see Blaine blushing. “I was going to surprise you with breakfast in bed, but you woke up…” he trailed off.  
  
It was Kurt who kissed Blaine’s cheek this time. “You’re adorable, but you didn’t have to do that. I don’t need to be pampered.”  
  
Blaine finished the pancakes and turned in Kurt’s arms, kissing him lightly. “Come on, let’s eat; I’m starving.”  
  
“Where do you keep your plates?” Kurt said, releasing Blaine and turning his back to him, looking for the kitchen’s cabinets.  
  
“In the –“ Blaine started to answer, but stopped suddenly.  
  
“Blaine?” Kurt frowned, turning his head to look at the younger man.  
  
Blaine’s eyes were fixed on Kurt’s body, his mouth open, jaw almost on the floor.  
  
“What?” Kurt asked, self-conscious, looking at himself.  
  
“You’re wearing my clothes.”  
  
“Oh, um…” Kurt felt his cheeks turning pink – why did he have to be so white? “I… I didn’t want to open my suitcases to search for some clothes… I hope you don’t mind that I borrowed yours…”  
  
“They’re really tight,” Blaine said, his eyes still fixed on Kurt’s body even though Kurt had turned to face him now.  
  
“Uh… yeah, I guess my shoulders are a little broader than yours…”  
  
Before Kurt could even blink, Blaine was invading his personal space, eyes huge, pupils dilated. “You look hot,” he said, his hands already on Kurt’s hips, pushing Kurt until the back of his thighs hit the table. “So hot that I… my clothes really look good on you.”  
  
“What are you doing?” Kurt asked when Blaine started to kiss and nip his neck.   
  
“You’re gorgeous, Kurt. I’m sure people tell you this all the time. You’re gorgeous and you’re wearing my clothes and you look delicious in them,” Blaine said, his hot breath on Kurt’s ear.   
  
The ‘ _you look delicious_ ’ comment almost made Kurt laugh it was so cheesy and cliché. Kurt wasn’t able to do anything else but tremble and moan when Blaine sucked on his earlobe. “I want you,” Blaine said.   
  
“I thought you were hungry,” Kurt said faintly when Blaine held him by the waist so he could sit on the table.  
  
“I am,” Blaine said, his voice in a low growl. “For you,” he added, while taking off his apron and tossing it to the floor.  
  
“Oh,” was all that Kurt said, because that was a really lame pick up line and yet it had left Kurt turned on so fast that he felt dizzy. All coherent thought left him when Blaine looked at him and, oh, Blaine looked like a predator now, the hazel of his eyes almost black with lust. Kurt decided that he had no objection to being Blaine’s prey.  
  
He threw his head back as Blaine kneeled on the floor, pulling at his sweatpants, in a clear message of what he wanted. Blaine made Kurt forget there was even a world outside the kitchen; his whole world revolved around them, together, the way it should be.  
  
They had to clean the table later. And reheat the pancakes. They tasted like rubber because Kurt ended up kissing Blaine – again – while the pancakes were in the microwave and they completely forgot they were there. They ate them like that anyway, anxious to go back to the bedroom.  
  
Percival ate all their leftovers, though, and he didn’t complain.  
  
\--  
  
The only times Kurt had ever spent the whole weekend in bed were the times he was sick, when he felt too tired to move. Usually, on Broadway, weekends were the busiest. On weekends they always played sold-out shows and, of course, there were the Sundays with the 4 PM and the 8 PM shows.   
  
Today, as Kurt woke up in Blaine’s bed for the second day in a row, he thought that he could really get used to this. Sleeping by Blaine’s side was something new and yet natural, their bodies seeking each other even in sleep. Kurt was now spooning the younger man, his right arm thrown over Blaine’s waist. He had never been too fond of cuddling, but that was because he’d never wanted someone next to him all the time. Now he did.   
  
He could tell it was late in the morning because the blinds were doing a poor job of stopping the light from coming in. Percival was lying on the floor next to Blaine, and the sunlight coming from the window was hitting him on the face, but he didn’t seem to mind. He was more interested in chewing what appeared to be one of Blaine’s shoes. Ooops. Kurt hoped it was an old shoe, at least.  
  
Blaine was sleeping deeply and Kurt didn’t want to wake him up, but his bladder was screaming, so he removed his arm carefully from Blaine’s waist and sat up slowly. Blaine mumbled something like a complaint and hugged a nearby pillow, quieting again.  
  
The face that looked at Kurt in the mirror – and hey, Blaine had bought a new one! – was a face Kurt almost didn’t recognize. There were the same gray/blue eyes, the same pale face and his hair was tousled, which was natural for someone who had just woken up. For someone that didn’t Know Kurt better, he looked normal.  
  
But, of course, Kurt knew his own face from countless times he practiced speeches in front of the mirror, from countless times he had performed his skin care regimen, so he knew he looked different.  
  
There was a new light in his eyes, shining brighter than he’d ever seen. There was a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, one he couldn’t contain. If Kurt had to describe his face this exact moment, the only word he could come up with was… happy. He looked happy.  
  
He and Blaine had spent two whole days in bed, getting up only for showers and food, and Kurt doubted the third one would be any different. The sex was great, of course it was, but it wasn’t everything they did.   
  
They talked a lot, mostly about how it would be for them to try a long-distance relationship. Both men wanted to see where the feelings they had for each other would lead them, but they knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Kurt’s life was crazy- meetings and dinners and rehearsals scheduled for weeks in advance. Not to mention the shows every night, except on Mondays, and twice on Sundays. All his free time was devoted to sleep. Blaine’s life was much simpler, but he had his job at the Centre that he couldn’t leave at short notice. People depended on him; it was okay to leave Nick and Jeff taking care of everything for a couple of days, but he needed to go back. So, they knew it would be a while before they could see each other again.  
  
On Monday Kurt went to spend the afternoon with Burt while Blaine went to his sessions at the Community Centre. Kurt would leave on Tuesday morning for Dayton with Blaine, return the rental car, and Blaine would go back to Lima on his motorcycle.  
  
They would Skype, email, text, but it wouldn’t be the same. Kurt could feel the beginning of fear coiling inside his stomach. He was afraid of having his heart broken. He was afraid of what distance would do to a relationship still in its first steps. He was afraid of hurting Blaine, of   
wiping the ever-present smile on his face.  
  
When Blaine texted him ‘ _hey, can your dad give you a ride to my house? Something came up and I can’t pick you up_ ’, Kurt didn’t think anything of it. He asked Burt to take him and at seven PM, when he knew Blaine would already have arrived from work, Kurt went.  
  
The house was dark when Kurt arrived, but when he went to knock on the door, it was opened. Frowning, Kurt strained his ears for strange noises, heart beating fast. Maybe it was a thief? With all the condos around it, with their big walls and security cameras, Blaine’s little   
house looked alone and unprotected.   
  
Heart pounding, he stepped inside… and the lights went on suddenly, making Kurt blink several times to adjust his eyes.  
  
Blaine was in the middle of the living room dressed in a black suit with a black bowtie. He was holding a red rose and had a smile on his face, the one Kurt knew was only his. “Welcome home, baby,” he said, blushing a little.  
  
Kurt accepted he rose, still astonished. “Home?” he asked.  
  
Blaine made a gesture with his arms, indicating the house. “I know it’s not much, and the wonderful places you see on a daily basis don’t even compare with this small house. But,” Blaine held Kurt’s hand, eagerly, “they say that ‘home is where the heart is’, don’t they? So, this is your home, too, Kurt. Whenever you get tired of everything, whenever the pressure is too much… you just think of home, this home, our home, where I’ll be always waiting for you.”  
  
“Oh, Blaine…” Kurt murmured, his eyes already full of tears. “How come your cliché lines always make me cry?”  
  
“Um…because they come from heart?” Blaine said on purpose, mischief already dancing in his eyes.   
  
Kurt half-laughed, half-sobbed. “Stop. That line is even worse.”  
  
“But it’s working,” Blaine laughed, brushing his thumbs on Kurt’s wet cheeks.  
  
“Because you must be some wizard who put a spell on me,” Kurt joked, sniffing loudly.  
  
“Well, since you’re already crying…” Blaine said, and he released Kurt, turned to his stereo and put on an old song. As the first notes started, Blaine put his right hand on Kurt’s while his left arm rested on Kurt’s waist, and began to sway slowly. “I’m trying to be romantic here, so bear with me, okay?”  
  
Kurt knew that song; it had always been one of his favorites because it reminded him of his mother. When Kurt was around seven, she would put this song and would dance with him. Later, as he grew up, whenever he heard the song, he would dream of dancing it with someone he loved but he’d never had the chance.  
  
Now, here he was, in a tiny living room in Lima, on a summer night, and there was a beautiful man singing this song to him. “Someday, when I'm awfully low, When the world is cold, I will feel a glow just thinking of you, and the way you look tonight,” Blaine sang next to Kurt’s ear. As they danced slowly, the tears started to fall freely now, because never in his whole life had Kurt Hummel felt so loved; so happy. Here, in his home town, in the place he’d always hated, he had found what he’d always been looking for: someone to belong to; the love of his life. ([http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKCuWlP_h5Q&feature=fvst](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKCuWlP_h5Q&feature=fvst))


	8. Chapter 8

“Kurt, five minutes!” someone knocked at Kurt’s dressing room.  
  
“I’m almost ready!” he said, turning his face so Ellie could apply some more make up – just a little blush so he wouldn’t look so pale.  
  
On the table, his phone buzzed. “ _Break a leg_!” said Blaine’s text, and “ _I <3 U_”.  
  
Kurt sent him a “ _Love you too_ ,” with as much discretion as he could. Ellie was a sweet girl, but she loved gossips like everyone who worked with the showbiz.   
  
Looking at his reflection in the mirror, Kurt couldn’t help but smile. He looked younger, happier. Everyone had noticed how much he had changed since he’d come back from Lima. Rachel had practically interrogated him. Kurt had evaded their questions saying he’d just needed some Ohio air and his family to feel like new, but he wasn’t sure they were buying it; mostly because he’d said several times how much he hated his hometown.   
  
The truth was that he was still feeling the “Blaine effect”; meaning he was still high with all the happiness from the weekend spent with Blaine. It had only been three days since Kurt had left Blaine waving at him at Dayton’s airport. He hopped that the “Blaine effect” would last at least a couple more days. It had been three days since they’d last kissed, three days since they’d last held each other. Kurt was already missing Blaine like crazy.  
  
They had talked to each other by Skype twice, but with Kurt’s hectic agenda there hadn’t been much time for them to talk properly. So they texted. Well, Blaine texted and Kurt answered whenever he could, whenever there wasn’t someone looking over his shoulder to see what he was doing. He’d never realized how much everyone seemed to pay attention to everything he did.  
  
Before Kurt got up, his phone buzzed again. Looking at it Kurt let out a burst of laughter. Blaine had sent him a picture of Percival wearing a purple hat that said ‘LUV YA’ in bright yellow letters. Poor Percival didn’t look so happy, but he’d always been a docile animal and Kurt could imagine the dog patiently waiting with resignation while Blaine took the picture.  
  
“Kurt!” someone knocked on his door again, “It’s time.”  
  
Kurt took a deep breath and opened the door wearing his costume and looking like his character. He felt giddy, full of energy and joy. He stopped behind the curtains to take another deep breath and concentrate. Rupert was a dramatic, sad man, and Kurt couldn’t go on stage smiling.   
  
That night he and Rachel got another standing ovation and Kurt could feel in his gut that it had been one of the best performances of his life.  
  
\--  
  
Four weeks later, though, he wasn’t feeling so giddy anymore. There was less and less time for his Skype sessions with Blaine because there was always something for Kurt to do, somewhere for Kurt to go, a little photo session here, an interview there, and when he got home late at night Blaine was already in bed. Blaine’s free time was on weekends, mostly, and weekends were when Kurt was the busiest.   
  
Kurt knew it was going to be hard. He didn’t know it was going to be that hard.   
  
“There’s nothing we can do,” Blaine said one night, over the phone. “You have your work and all the endless appointments that come with it. I understand, Kurt.”  
  
“Well, I don’t,” Kurt said stubbornly. “I miss seeing your face.” It was late and he was already in bed, fighting sleep. He knew Blaine was tired, too but they hadn’t had any other time to talk.  
  
“Me, too, Kurt. But hey, I bought People. Your interview was great and the photo shoots...”  
  
“It was just a couple of pictures,” Kurt said trying not to yawn loudly.  
  
“But they were great. And I kept looking at them at the mall… and all I could think was ‘wow, this guy is my boyfriend’. It seems… unreal, sometimes. I had to buy one.”  
  
“You better believe it’s real, Blaine Anderson,” Kurt said, determined. “I’m not letting you go.”  
  
Blaine grew very quiet for a while. “I hope you don’t, Kurt. I mean, there are so many things for you out there and here I’m just – “  
  
“Blaine, please,” Kurt said in a tired voice. “Let’s not start this talk again, okay? We’re boyfriends, I want to be with you, so let’s try to make the most of it, okay?”  
  
“-kay”, Blaine replied.  
  
“I know it’s hard, the distance is killing me, too, but Blaine,” Kurt pleaded, “Don’t give up, okay? Don’t talk like that again, you promise.”  
  
Blaine sighed. “Okay. I’m sorry.”  
  
“I love you.” Kurt whispered.  
  
“I love you, too,” Blaine whispered back.  
  
There was silence for a few seconds then, “Blaine?” Kurt asked with a shy voice.  
  
“What, baby?”  
  
“Remember when you sang to me when we were dancing in your house?”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“Sing to me? Please?” Kurt asked with a small voice.   
  
“Now?”  
  
“Now,” Kurt nodded, even though he knew Blaine couldn’t see him. “This way I can pretend you’re here with me.”  
  
“’kay, baby,” Blaine whispered.  
  
Kurt cradled the phone next to his ear, between his pillow and blanket.  
  
 _“I just want to see you when you're all alone, I just want to catch you if I can; I just want to be there when the morning light explodes on your face, it radiates, I cannot escape, I love you 'till the end._ ” (<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4o7O5pTQMAE>)  
  
Kurt closed his eyes and sighed contently. Blaine wasn’t there but Kurt could feel his love radiating through the phone and reaching Kurt, filling him and surrounding him. That was enough to lull him to sleep.  
  
\--  
  
Kurt couldn’t go to Lima for Christmas. All the tickets for his play were sold out until mid-January. His producer made it perfectly clear how displeased he would be if Kurt left New York, especially because many people came to spend Christmas and New Year’s Eve in the city and wanted to see Kurt Hummel’s play with Kurt Hummel in it, not his understudy.  
  
“It’s alright, Kurt,” Blaine said, when Kurt gave him the bad news, but the resignation in his voice was evident.  
  
“I really wish I could go,” Kurt said, feeling an unpleasant weight in his heart.   
  
“Yeah. Me, too.”  
  
December 23rd was a Friday. Kurt would have one performance, and after that he would have only two days for himself. He would go back on Tuesday the 27th. After the play, he refused a couple of invitations for drinks and parties and decided to head straight home. He was   
tired, the winter was being terrible to his skin (it was so dry) and all he wanted was to curl up on his sofa with a cup of hot cocoa and maybe call Blaine. It was late, but he knew the young man wouldn’t work on Saturday so maybe they could stay on Skype until later.  
  
There was a note on his front door. “I found this cute couple on the streets, so I offered them a place to stay. I hope you don’t mind. Annie.”  
  
Kurt opened the door already knowing who she was talking about. “Dad! Carole!” he yelled from the living room, smiling and happy with the surprise.  
  
“Hey, kiddo!” Burt came from the corridor, with Carole behind him. “You look good.”  
  
They hugged for a long time, releasing each other only when Carole started to complain that she wanted a hug too. “I hope you liked the surprise?” she asked.  
  
“Gosh, yes!” Kurt threw himself on the sofa, pulling her with him, while Burt sat on the nearby armchair. “So you and Annie went behind my back, huh?”  
  
Burt nodded. “She called us and said you looked too sad and that you threw a fit when you were told you wouldn’t have a Christmas break longer than two days. She suggested we come and cheer you up, so here we are.”  
  
“That girl really cares about you, Kurt,” Carole said.  
  
“I love her to pieces,” Kurt said with a fond smile. “She’s the best PA ever and a good friend.”  
  
“She picked us up at the airport this afternoon and I swear to God, Kurt, she didn’t stop talking about you and how wonderful you are the entire time till we got here.”  
  
“She does that, yes, it’s a little embarrassing,” Kurt chuckled. “Hey, who wants some hot cocoa?” he asked, getting up and heading for the kitchen.  
  
Carole put a hand on his arm. “Why don’t you take a shower first? I think I still remember where you keep everything here; let me make the cocoa for us.”  
  
“No, no,” Kurt shook his head. “You’re my guests!”  
  
“Go have some rest, kiddo. We’re staying for New Year’s Eve; too, we’ll have plenty of time to chat. Go take a shower; let me and Carole handle everything.”  
  
“Thanks, Dad,” Kurt sighed. He really wanted a shower. “I’ll be right back,” he said, heading to his bedroom.  
  
“Oh, take your time!” Burt said. “And while you’re there, take a look at the present we brought for you!”  
  
“Present? Oh Dad, you didn’t have to.”  
  
Burt winked. “Oh, we had to. Believe me; I think you’ll like it a lot. Go and take a look.”  
  
Frowning, Kurt walked to his bedroom, trying to guess what it could possibly be. He loved his Dad more than anything, but Burt was completely clueless about what presents to give to his son. Carole was the sweetest woman Kurt knew, but she was as clueless as Burt. Not even Kurt’s wildest dreams could have prepared him for what he would see.  
  
There was someone on his bed; a mop of curly, black hair on his pillow, the face hidden by the blankets. Kurt already knew who it was. His heart was beating fast, and with a sharp intake of breath he murmured, “Blaine…”  
  
Kurt stopped near the bed where Blaine was apparently sleeping like a baby. “Oh my…” he paused, blinking a few times to make sure it wasn’t a dream. “Blaine, you’re here…” he murmured again, letting his bag fall to the ground with a soft ‘thud’.  
  
The head with the dark curls immediately moved and half-opened, sleepy hazel eyes appeared from under the duvet. “Kurt?”  
  
Kurt was already taking his shoes and his coat off and sitting on the bed close to Blaine. “I can’t believe you’re here…”  
  
Blaine’s face was completely uncovered now and he looked at Kurt, uncertain. “I – I hope you don’t mind that I’m here in your bed. I was tired, and Burt said I could come and wait for you her – mmmph!”  
  
Kurt didn’t let Blaine finish; he had to kiss him now. He’d missed his taste, his smell, and his arms that gripped tight at Kurt’s shoulders. “You can be in my bed all you want,” Kurt said, attempting to joke. The truth was he wanted to cry with happiness, and until he met Blaine he didn’t know it was possible.  
  
Blaine was already crying, it seemed, because Kurt started to taste salt in the kiss. He clutched at Kurt’s shirt desperately, half-laughing and half-sobbing between the kisses that grew more intense. “So long, Kurt,” he said, sniffing, but still kissing Kurt with everything he had.   
“Missed you so much…”  
  
“Me, too, baby, me, too,” Kurt was already laying on the bed, pressing Blaine on the mattress. “Hey… you’re crying…” he said, while his mouth traveled to Blaine’s soft neck and he buried his hands in the black curls he loved so much.  
  
“You’re crying, too…” Blaine was pulling at the hem of Kurt’s shirt, his hands feeling like fire on Kurt’s skin.  
  
“I’m happy,” Kurt murmured, while doing the same with Blaine’s shirt. “I’m happy I can kiss you and hold you like this. Gosh, I was dying here without you.”  
  
“I was dying there without you, too, Kurt.”  
  
Their kisses grew deeper and longer, and soon there weren’t words enough to express their feelings, only sighs and moans, hands, mouths, legs, hearts. Later, their pace slowed; the desperation not so strong; they wanted to enjoy the moment as much as they could. They ended up with Kurt sitting on the bed, his back leaning on the headboard with Blaine on his lap, riding him slowly. They stared at each other the whole time, hands on each other’s faces, mouths occasionally touching in soft kisses.  
  
“I’m afraid to blink and realize this is a dream,” Blaine said, after another kiss.  
  
“Nothing seems right here without you, Blaine,” Kurt said, throwing his arms around Blaine’s waist and drawing him closer. “Nothing’s good, nothing’s beautiful, all I want is you, all the time. What have you done to me?” Kurt asked, getting desperate again, pulling Blaine’s head   
until their mouths were touching again, this time in a deeper kiss.  
  
Blaine quickened the pace again, trembling in Kurt’s arms. “I think about you all the time, Kurt. You’re everything I want,” he said, as he started to move faster and faster, his hands on Kurt’s shoulders for leverage. “You’re everything,” he half-sobbed, burying his face where   
Kurt’s neck met the shoulder. “I want – I want to stay like this and never move,” he said, before he started shuddering and clutching at Kurt’s arms harder.  
  
Kurt’s vision started to dance in a spiral that threatened to take him. “Then move in with me, Blaine. Stay here forever,” he said between labored breaths, and Blaine kissed him harder, invading all his senses, invading his body, his soul, everything. Kurt was gone, drowning,   
drowning until there was nowhere else to go but up, where a pool of light waited for him.  
  
Later, still in bed, both were on their backs, hand in hand, facing the ceiling.  
  
“I hope we didn’t give your father and Carole a show,” Blaine said, smirking softly. “I completely forgot they were here.”  
  
“Oh, shit!” Kurt put covered his mouth with his hand, eyes widening. “I was supposed to go back there; Carole was making hot cocoa for us!”  
  
“Well…” Blaine said, “Crap.”  
  
They burst out laughing and Blaine rolled on top of Kurt, resting his chin on his hands on Kurt’s chest. “How am I going to look at your father in the eye ever again?”  
  
Kurt chuckled. “Well, bringing you was his idea, I suppose?”  
  
Blaine nodded.  
  
“So he shouldn’t be surprised that we didn’t go back to the living room. Although I’ve never had sex with anyone while my father was in the same house.”  
  
“Oh, my God,” Blaine gave a short laugh, embarrassed.  
  
“He’ll recover, Blaine.”  
  
Blaine laughed. “Well, maybe I won’t. I hope he doesn’t have a gun.”  
  
“He has an old one but I’m sure he left in Lima.”  
  
They laughed again, holding each other and eventually they turned from laughing to kissing, which led to more interesting activities and Burt was forgotten for moment.  
  
They settled on the bed again, after round two and a shower, Blaine lying on his back and Kurt resting his head on his stomach.  
  
“I’m curious, though. How did you end up here with my family?”   
  
“Burt called. Said you were sad. We’ve been talking a little, mostly about you, sometimes about me… Anyways, I’d never taken any vacation time since I started working at the Centre, so… here I am. It was hard not to tell you I was coming, the last time we talked by phone.”  
  
“I didn’t know you and Dad were talking regularly,” Kurt frowned a little. Burt hadn’t mentioned Blaine in any of the times they talked.  
  
“Well, you remember when my motorcycle broke? I told you he was the one who fixed it.”  
  
“You did; I just didn’t know you two kept in contact.”  
  
Blaine shrugged a little. “He’s a great guy. We seem to get along well.”  
  
“I’m glad, because I’m never letting you go.”  
  
“I’ve even told him how my Grandfather gave me and Cooper a lot of money – you know, our share of the family’s inheritance - before the ‘accident’. I told him that I used some of it for college, some to buy my house and the rest is still in the bank.”  
  
“Oh Gosh, Blaine, you didn’t have to! He interrogated you?” Kurt hid his face with his hands. “I can’t believe that.”  
  
“It’s okay,” Blaine shrugged. “He’s your father. I think he liked the fact that I live a simple life because I want to, not because I have no other choice. I think that, you know, you being an artist and all, he had to be sure I’m not an opportunist.”  
  
“I know that.”  
  
“You know. But your father didn’t. Now that he knows I‘m not after your money, I feel a lot better. He used to make me nervous at first.”  
  
“My father?” Kurt laughed.  
  
Blaine snorted. “Hey, he may be a great dad, but he doesn’t look exactly like a Care Bear and he’s taller than me. When he looked at my motorcycle with so much disdain I couldn’t contain myself and blurted out the story of my whole family right there, in the middle of his   
workplace.”   
  
Kurt laughed with gusto. “It might’ve been some scene.”  
  
“You’re kidding me? I was terrified!”  
  
Blaine closed his eyes and his breath slowed and calmed to the point that he seemed to be sleeping. Kurt closed his eyes, too; he was exhausted but at the same time so happy that he wanted to start singing and dancing like a lunatic. He would, if he had any strength left in his body.  
  
“Blaine?” he asked in a soft voice, after a while.  
  
“Mmmmm?”  
  
“I meant what I said, you know.”  
  
“What?” Blaine asked with a sleepy voice.  
  
“That I want you to stay forever.” Kurt took a deep breath. “I’d like you to… think about moving here to New York. With me.”  
  
Blaine went rigid in Kurt’s arms, and Kurt almost regretted what he’d just said. “In New York?” Blaine asked.  
  
“I mean,” Kurt backpedalled, “I know you have your job there, and people you love, but… maybe you could think about some changes in your life?”  
  
Blaine disentangled himself from Kurt slowly, carefully, and sat up on the bed, facing him. “Kurt, I…” he started and he looked lost, not knowing what to say.  
  
“We don’t have to talk about this now,” Kurt said in a hurry, fearing that Blaine’s answer was no.  
  
Blaine took a deep breath and held one of Kurt’s hands. “There’s nothing I want more than to stay with you forever,” he said slowly. “I’ve never been in love before – not that I remember, anyway – and you’re it for me, Kurt. You’re all I want.”  
  
“But?” Kurt prodded because, of course, there was always a ‘but’.  
  
Blaine took another breath. “But I’m not ready.”  
  
Kurt deflated like a balloon. “I thought, I mean, I know we’ve never talked about it, but I’ve always thought we were serious about each other, Blaine.”  
  
Blaine nodded vigorously. “We are! I said it, Kurt, you’re it for me; I’m yours and I’ll always be. The thing is that…I’m not ready to leave Lima. Not yet. I need… I need familiarity, Kurt. I need to be with people I know, with the things that are familiar to me. Without familiarity I… I get lost.”  
  
“But I’ll be here with you!” Kurt reasoned.  
  
“It’s not the same thing, Kurt…” Blaine closed his eyes briefly. “There are so many things you don’t know about me that I… don’t feel comfortable talking about.”  
  
“Talk to me, Blaine,” Kurt insisted, pleaded. “I want to understand if you let me.”  
  
Blaine sighed. “You have no idea what it feels like to look at your life and see nothing. No past, nothing. It’s there, but out of reach forever. I felt lost in my own house; my family felt like complete strangers. It was worse when we moved to LA, because I started having panic attacks. I used to look around and there was nothing to ground me, no one I really knew and I had no idea who I was. I felt lost, adrift and then I couldn’t breathe I lost count of how many times my family – Cooper, most of the time – had to take me to the psychiatrist like I was some kind of psycho.”   
  
“I know it was hard Blaine, but look, you have me, I can help you. I’ll be with you all the time and we’re going to make this work!” Kurt said, grabbing Blaine’s hand.  
  
It was the wrong thing to say, apparently, because Blaine got up and started pacing the bedroom like a caged animal, in nothing but his briefs. It would have been funny if his face weren’t so troubled.  
  
“No, Kurt, you don’t know how hard it was, how hard it still is. I love Lima because I feel like I’m someone there: I make a difference, I help people, I walk through the streets that I know and some places give me vague memories here and there. You have no idea how important this is for me, to feel that I have somewhere to be myself with no expectations.”  
  
“Oh, Blaine…”  
  
“Kurt, if I came here, you wouldn’t be with me all the time, you’d be working, and that’s okay, that’s your life. I don’t need you to be with me all the time, Kurt! The way you talk, it looks like I need a baby sitter and I don’t. I can take care of myself, shit; I’ve been doing that for more than a year now, living alone with my dog. I don’t need anyone to ‘take care of me’ or ‘stay with me’ because I’m not a child.”  
  
“What about the future, Blaine?” Kurt asked, feeling lost.  
  
“The future… is something I try not to think about a lot. I’m not a victim, Kurt and I refuse to act like one. At this moment I need to feel like I belong somewhere and right now that place is Lima. I grew up there and I did remember the choir room, after all.”   
  
Kurt tried to keep a snort from coming. McKinley High, the place that Kurt had hated so much; where he’d been bullied, shoved against lockers, kissed against his will… that was the place Blaine thought was the most familiar to him? How fucked up was that? How ironic was the fact that the same city Kurt had loathed his whole life was the one Blaine felt secure and familiar? Very ironic, because in that same city Blaine had been beaten almost to death.  
  
“So you’re saying what, that you’ll live in Lima forever? What about me?” Kurt didn’t realize that his voice was higher and that he was starting to sound angry. “I can’t leave New York. What about us? Do you think we can go on like this forever? Seeing each other on holidays?”   
  
“I’m not saying that, I’m just asking for some time!” Blaine said, exasperatedly.  
  
“So your answer is no?” Kurt snapped because he was scared. His default defensive mode clicked in place. “That’s it? You’d rather stay in Lima than to stay with me?”  
  
Blaine looked at Kurt as if he’d been slapped. “I saw that coming didn’t I?” he said bitterly. “What did I tell you when we first kissed? I told you I knew you were going to want something I couldn’t give; I told you I had nothing to give. There it is.”   
  
Kurt rolled his eyes. “Blaine, don’t make a drama out of this. I just asked you to move in with me and you said no. You don’t have to turn this into a mea culpa moment.”  
  
Blaine’s eyes hardened. “I told you but you didn’t want to listen. You shouldn’t have wasted your time to begin with, and if you think I’m making a drama out of this then maybe I shouldn’t be here.” His voice assumed a sarcastic tone. “It’s really just a silly story, some stupid wacko who had his whole past beaten out of his memories, whose family doesn’t care about him anymore because it turned out the wacko was gay and they didn’t know, and hey, he could have been someone important, like a lawyer, but he’s just this silly therapist who pretends to be a musician in a city in the middle of nowhere. He must be nuts because he’s actually happy with his life and what’s to like in a life as fucked up as this one, right?”  
  
“Blaine, wait,” Kurt said, immediately regretting his words. “I didn’t mean it, I swear.”  
  
“I know how pathetic my life is next to yours, Kurt,” Blaine said, sounding defeated. “How small and insignificant. I thought we had something special going on here and maybe it could work if we stopped looking at the images we project to everyone and started to think that we’re just two guys who want to be together. But…I think that maybe it’s better if I remove my drama – that I know looks like a badly written soap opera – from your life because you already have too much on your plate and you certainly don’t need one more problem in your   
life.”  
  
Blaine grabbed his pants and started putting them on, but Kurt got up in a hurry and grabbed his arm. “Blaine, no, no baby, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Kurt pulled Blaine to him in a hug, and Blaine let himself be held but remained rigid in Kurt’s arms. “I shouldn’t have said that, you’re not making a drama and your life is not pathetic, I swear!”  
  
“Kurt…” Blaine sighed, the fight already gone from his posture.  
  
“Blaine, I love you, please, baby, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to pressure you, it’s – it’s just that I miss you so much! And I thought it would be nice if you could live here with me.”  
  
“You think I don’t want that? To stay with you?” Blaine asked, shaking his head. “We’ve known each other for only seven months, and we’ve been dating for en even shorter time – most of it spent apart. I know you’re the one I want; I’m sure of it like I’ve never been before. I   
wouldn’t ask you to wait if I didn’t need that, Kurt – “   
  
“I know, I know, and I can wait, I swear I can! I’m sorry if I made you feel that coming to New York is a condition for us to be together. It’s not. I’m just new at this ‘falling in love’ thing so sometimes I act like a selfish jerk and I am impatient, but… I love you and I don’t want you   
to forget that; ever.“  
  
Blaine slowly put his arms around Kurt’s neck, kissing him briefly, but he still was a little tense. “This is new for me, too. But I love you and I know we can make it work. I don’t want to be a selfish prick either; I know I don’t have just me and my issues to think about now that   
we’re together.”  
  
“But those issues exist and I can wait until you deal with them,” Kurt said softly. “I’ll give you all the time you need.”   
  
Blaine sighed, resting his forehead on Kurt’s. “I think we need to think about what we need as a couple, not only what I need. I know distance puts a strain on every relationship, and ours won’t be an exception. I promise to do my best to come here more often since my weekends are mostly free. We’ll find a way.”   
  
Kurt nodded, pulling Blaine even closer. “We will.”  
  
They kissed for a long time, neither wanting to let the other go. Now Blaine was completely relaxed in Kurt’s arms, and he gave a small sigh of contentment.  
  
“Our first fight,” Kurt said.  
  
“It had to happen sometime,” Blaine kissed Kurt’s cheek, “And I read somewhere that fights make relationships grow and mature.”  
  
“Who the hell wrote shit like that? I hated this fight. I hated fighting with you.” Kurt nuzzled Blaine’s ear. “Let’s not fight again, okay?”  
  
“Okay,” Blaine sighed, planting little kisses on Kurt’s neck. “But I still think fighting may have something good in it.”  
  
“If you’re going to say that it helps us know each other Blaine, or any other cheesy/Hallmark line, I swear – “   
  
Blaine planted a wet kiss on Kurt’s lips. “Nothing like that, silly. But they say make-up sex is fantastic…”  
  
“I like the way your mind works, Mr. Anderson,” Kurt laughed, pulling Blaine back to the bed.  
  
\--  
  
Kurt had received numerous invitations to Christmas parties, but he politely declined each one of them. Carole insisted on making her famous ‘Maple-Syrup-Glazed Roast Turkey with Riesling Gravy’ recipe and Kurt couldn’t say no to that, could he? Finn and his wife had gone to Texas with the kids, to spend the holidays with her family. Kurt was going to have a nice and calm Christmas with his parents and the man he loved. What could be better than that?  
  
Kurt and Blaine didn’t fight anymore, but they also didn’t talk about Blaine moving to New York again. They silently decided to enjoy the time they had together and let the future take care of itself. For now. Kurt wasn’t completely happy with that but he’d rather have Blaine on weekends than not having him at all.  
  
Annie, Kurt’s PA, loved Blaine. She started to refer to him affectionately as ‘Puppy’ because his cheery disposition spread like a virus. Kurt, who had never decorated his luxurious apartment for Christmas, found himself buying a Christmas tree and ornaments on the last possible day and he and Blaine spent Christmas Eve decorating it while Carole and Burt watched old Christmas movies on the TV.   
  
Rachel came by on Christmas Day with the pretext of getting to know the ‘famous Blaine Kurt keeps talking about’, but Kurt suspected she’d hoped to see Finn. Kurt could easily see the disappointment in Rachel’s eyes when Finn wasn’t there – she had never really forgotten him – but she was an actress, and a good one, so no one noticed. She was an example of someone who had traded the love of her life – Finn – for the chance at being famous. Well, now she was famous but still single, unable to have a stable relationship and Kurt knew part of her regretted her decision till this day.  
  
He didn’t want that to happen to him.   
  
Rachel stayed for lunch and practically interrogated Blaine about ‘his true intentions towards her best friend’. Blaine answered everything politely, barely hiding an amused smile. Even though Kurt already knew about it, Rachel had asked about Blaine’s financial condition with such insistence that he sheepishly revealed that his family was actually a wealthy one. Rachel beamed in approval and Kurt rolled his eyes. He loved Rachel like a sister, but she clearly had her priorities in the wrong order.  
  
They ate Carole’s turkey like kings and slept the whole afternoon. At night, they went to see the lights at Central Park. Kurt was thankful for New York’s anonymity; he and Blaine were able to walk side by side, hand in hand and no one noticed. People just passed by and minded their own business. Only when Blaine insisted on taking a picture with Kurt under Kurt’s huge poster in Times Square did Kurt see people staring and smiling at them, but thankfully, no photographer. Kurt supposed even the paparazzi had families to go to on Christmas, and for that, he was thankful.  
  
Kurt went back to work on December the 27th. Annie found a place for Blaine in the front row and Kurt had never felt so nervous about going on stage. He wanted Blaine to like him, his performance, his voice, everything. When he went up on stage for the curtain call and saw Blaine’s huge, proud smile he’d never felt so happy in his whole life. It was hard not to go down and pull Blaine to the stage with him, kissing him in front of everyone.   
  
But he was Kurt Hummel, and Kurt Hummel was nothing but discrete about his personal life; even if his heart was bursting with joy. He kept the façade, bowing to the audience beside Rachel. She winked and waved at Blaine, though.  
  
TBC


	9. Chapter 9

“It’s Cooper,” Blaine announced with dismay three days later, turning his cell phone off. “He said he’s coming to New Year’s Eve. Maybe Annie can help me find him a hotel? He said he’s trying, but there’s no place left in this whole city.”

“He can stay here. I have a spare room, since we’re sharing mine.”

“Kurt, no way,” Blaine shook his head. “Cooper is… he’s obnoxious and completely full of himself. He spends money like the world is about to end. He’ll give you acting tips I’m sure you don’t need. You’re gonna hate him, Kurt, and I don’t think Burt or Carole will like him, either.”

“But he’s your brother.”

Blaine sighed. “Yes.”

Kurt went on. “The same brother who took you to music therapy during your recovery time, the one who convinced your parents that you should go to college to do what you wanted and the one who went to Lima with you and later helped you settle there after you’d found a job.”

“Humm…”Blaine frowned, “Yes.”

“He also gave you Percival.”

“Kurt…”

“And you love him. Not the Cooper you grew up with, but this one, the one who stood by you and didn’t care when you told your family you’re gay. I don’t think I’m mistaken, Blaine, your brother loves you.”

Blaine sighed. “Fine. But don’t forget it was your idea, in case you want to blame me later.”

Cooper was obnoxious. He had an incredible amount of self-confidence that didn’t match his talent. He took possession of Kurt’s third room, complained it was too small, didn’t help with the dishes and even decided which TV program everyone would watch on his first night in New York. He was gorgeous, tall, with the most wonderful blue yes, smiled all the time - just like Blaine – and Carole was immediately charmed by him. And Rachel. And Annie. And, believe it or not, Burt.

It was also obvious that the loved his little brother very much.

Cooper Anderson was a force that couldn’t be contained. He craved attention and it was given to him freely, in a way Kurt had never seen before. Kurt and Blaine looked at each other in disbelief while Cooper monopolized the audience at dinner, telling one bad joke after the other and making everyone laugh. While doing that, he ate half the apple pie not even worrying that Rachel didn’t get a piece. “I told you,” Blaine said, rolling his eyes. 

The next day Cooper and Blaine disappeared early in the morning, for a whole day of sightseeing, Cooper explained. He already knew the city but he wanted to show everything to Blaine; places they’d gone as kids with their parents and Blaine didn’t remember anymore. Cooper wanted to go to these places with Blaine again so now Blaine would remember they’d been there together. Kurt thought it was the sweetest thing in the world.

They came back full of bags, arguing about Blaine’s fashion sense – or lack of – while Cooper insisted that Blaine would thank him one day when he was photographed beside Kurt and didn’t look like a school kid. The thought of it made Kurt freeze and Blaine frown because in their happy bubble they had almost forgotten that, while Blaine would gladly remain anonymous for the rest of his life, Kurt was famous.

At Kurt’s last show of the year; December the 30th, Cooper charmed Annie into getting him and Blaine two seats in the front row. When Kurt went to the customary curtain call, the audience giving him and Rachel another standing ovation, Cooper was there with Blaine, clapping enthusiastically, and his happy smile was so genuine that Kurt’s breath hitched. He knew in that moment that he’d just gotten Cooper Anderson’s approval; and, until that moment, Kurt hadn’t realized how much he’d wanted it. 

\--

“Thank you,” Cooper said, on New Year’s Eve, a few minutes before midnight. He had a tall glass in his hand with something that didn’t look like champagne, and Kurt could tell he was a little tipsy - maybe more than a little. “You make him happy.” 

Kurt had had a few glasses of wine himself, so that’s probably why he said the first thing that came into his head. “I love him.” Well, it was true.

“I know; it’s easy to see,” Cooper said, taking a long sip from his glass and making a face. “Blaine smiles a lot, but I know him. This is the first time I see him truly happy since the… bashing.”

Both men looked at Blaine while he played Christmas songs – and where had that guitar come from? – and Carole applauded enthusiastically. He looked so young, with his black hair messy as always, his red silly sweater with a Happy 2023 on the front and his eager to please expression. Kurt was sure there was a movie about Christmas holidays somewhere with a little boy that looked just like Blaine.

“He loves you, too,” Cooper had a small but fond smile. “You’re the first person he really fell in love with, Kurt, I hope you know that.”

Kurt had never asked about Blaine’s previous boyfriends. Although Blaine was great in bed and Kurt was more than happy with him he had the feeling that Blaine hadn’t had too much experience in the sex department. Kurt planned to change that, as long as Blaine acquired said experience with him and no one else. 

Apparently the drink had left Cooper’s tongue a little loose. “Seb –“ Cooper took a deep breath here, gritting his teeth a little “For Blaine, Sebastian was just the excitement of hiding your boyfriend from your parents, and look how that turned out. And Percy… he was a great guy, a little nerdy, but great; but that wasn’t love, I could tell, although Blaine didn’t really talk to me anymore. He dated Percy just because he was feeling lonely in college.”

“Oh.” Only two boyfriends? Two? Suddenly Kurt felt older than the five years that separated him from Blaine.

Cooper hadn’t finished, though. “With you… he’s in love, Kurt. I knew as soon as I saw you together. But he told me, thank God we’re starting to talk again, like we used to before… you know.”

”Is this the part where you threaten to kill me if I break your little brother’s heart?” Kurt asked, arching an eyebrow.

“I would never kill you,” Cooper said. “But I could hurt you a lot; I’m stronger and taller, so be careful.” Cooper laughed, patting Kurt’s back. “I can be a little overprotective sometimes.”

Kurt cocked his head to one side; this guy in front of him was nothing like obnoxious Cooper Anderson. Maybe Cooper wasn’t such a bad actor after all. He took a deep breath and even though he knew the wine had probably loosened his tongue, too, he didn’t care. “Can I tell you a secret, Cooper? I know it’s hard to believe, especially since I’ve been living and working here for ten years, but… I have never fallen in love before. Not really, not like this. I had many boyfriends, I’m sure you know how it is…”

Cooper snorted and nodded. “I have an idea, yeah. Showbiz and all…”

“But the point is, no one ever got too close. No one met my father or any member of my family; no one made me feel this way. So the last thing I intend to do is break your brother’s heart, because he’s the man I love and I’ve never said that about anyone.”

Cooper nodded again, turning to look at Blaine with a meditative expression “I’m glad we had this conversation. Happy New Year, Kurt.”

“Happy New Year, Cooper.” 

\--

Three weeks later and Kurt was already dying to see Blaine again. He was almost in agony because now that Blaine had come for the holidays, he’d had a small taste of how their life together could be. He wanted more. He wanted to go to sleep curled around Blaine and to wake up listening to his soft snore. He wanted to hear Blaine singing loudly in the shower and to complain that Blaine had forgotten to close the cupboard’s door again. 

He wanted everything.

He couldn’t have it. January was the poster month for ‘come and spend the winter in New York’. What did people do at night when they came to spend the winter in the Big Apple? They went to the theatre and Kurt’s play was on the top three most popular. There was no way he could leave, not even for a week.

So Blaine came, as soon as February started. He brought Percival this time, because his neighbor was sick and couldn’t stay with the dog like he’d done before. Percival had to be the sweetest animal in the whole world. As long as he was fed and could go for a walk once a day, Kurt didn’t even remember there was a dog in the apartment. None of his neighbors complained because Percival almost never barked.

The dog suffered a major transformation in Central Park, though. It was cold and Blaine had taken him for a walk, insisting that Kurt went with him. So there they were, Kurt and Blaine, in their heavy winter coats, scarves, gloves and hats and there was Percival, running after the poor doves like crazy. No one paid too much attention to them and they kissed and laughed and ate popcorn while Percival ran around them barking excitedly.

They even tried ice-skating, but Blaine fell so many times that Kurt took pity on him and took him to dinner, Percival in tow. The dog wasn’t allowed inside the restaurant, of course, but he was rewarded for waiting outside with a huge steak when they got home so, all in all, it   
was a great day.

Blaine spent three days and went back to Lima leaving Kurt with a cold and a promise to come back as soon as he could.

\---

Kurt’s cold didn’t get much better and since New York didn’t get any warmer, it turned into pharyngitis. The producer and the doctor made Kurt stay at home for a week and Blaine came back to New York as soon as he heard. Kurt wanted to ask him how the hell he had gotten even more time off his work but his throat hurt too much, so he just held his boyfriend close, unbelievably grateful for having him there. On the 12th Blaine went home, only a week after coming with two dozen red roses and an enormous ‘get well soon’ Hallmark card – typical – proclaiming he would come back when Kurt was feeling better.

That’s how Kurt spent their first Valentine’s Day in bed with Blaine, eating chicken soup and watching old reruns on TV, while Blaine made sure Kurt took his antibiotics in time. His throat felt awful but when Kurt was nestled in Blaine’s arms, eyes closed, listening to the muffled sound coming from the TV and feeling Blaine’s light kisses on his forehead, eyelids and nose, he thought his life was awesome.

It took Kurt ten days to get well enough to go back to work. Blaine went to see his play on the first night and the next day he caught the first plane to Dayton. Kurt didn’t take him to the airport because of an interview and he spent the entire day missing Blaine, complaining at everything and everyone and wishing his throat still hurt so Blaine could stay a little longer. 

Each time he had to say goodbye, it got worse.

\---

One a Wednesday evening in late March, Annie arrived with Kurt’s body-guard and driver, Harry, at five, like she always did, to pick up Kurt and take him to the theatre; he hated driving in New York. She looked pale and worried, and her too wide smile was so forced that Kurt lost count of how many times he asked he what was wrong. Every time, she would avert her eyes, saying it was nothing. 

The play went smoothly, as always, but Kurt noticed Rachel’s questioning gaze on him all the time. Since they hadn’t talked before the show, he assumed she had some new boyfriend drama to tell him and immediately regretted the thought. He hadn’t seen her as much as he used to; he was turning into a terrible friend.

After the play people at the theatre’s back door screamed his and Rachel’s name and Kurt stopped for an autograph or a picture here and there, as he always did. Rachel seemed particularly anxious to go home today because she kept tugging at Kurt’s sleeve murmuring ‘let’s go, let’s go’ under her breath. He saw the black SUV that usually took him home stopped by the sidewalk and Harry opened the door for him. He could see Annie’s head inside the car and Rachel was practically pushing him inside, which was strange, because they never went home in the same car.

Suddenly, a microphone was shoved under Kurt’s nose and a false blond reporter with an ugly pink coat materialized in front of him. “Hi, I’m Patricia from the ‘You Can Trust Us, It’s True!’ Magazine!” she said, with a sickening sweet smile. “Kurt, what do you have to say about   
your boyfriend?”

Kurt froze inside, but he was an actor, so he kept his cool expression firmly in place. ”I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said.

“Oh, I think you do! Your boyfriend, Blaine Anderson!” she insisted.

“Leave him alone, will you?” Rachel practically snarled at the woman, shoving Kurt inside the SUV before he could answer, and before he knew it, the SUV was running fast through the streets taking Kurt away from the reporter and the crowd.

Kurt took several deep breaths, feeling progressively calmer as they drove to his house. “Show me”, he said to Annie.

Al the girl’s hesitation, Rachel insisted. “Show him, Annie; he’ll see it anyway.”

Annie silently opened her bag where the magazine was. When she gave it to Kurt the first thing he saw was “You Can Trust, It’s True!” , written in bold red letters. It had to be the crappiest gossip magazine Kurt had ever seen – it matched its ridiculous name, of course. 

The headline about the last scandal surrounding Moira Springs, a young actress that enjoyed drinking too much for her own good, wasn’t what caught Kurt’s attention. It was the news on the bottom left of the cover that made his insides go cold. “Kurt Hummel has a boyfriend!” it said, in yellow letters. “Read everything about Blaine, Kurt’s sweetheart from Lima, Ohio, who lost his memories in a terrible event six years ago. More on page 25.” 

“Oh shit,” Kurt went pale, shoving the magazine at Rachel’s hands and pressing his eyes with the heels of his hands. “Oh, shit.”

\--

How on Earth they found out everything about Blaine’s life, Kurt would never know. Inside the damned magazine was a picture of him and Blaine having dinner together and another of them walking on the street holding hands. There it was, Blaine’s life, exposed for everyone to see. His accident, his memory loss, his wealthy family – that didn’t want to comment, thankfully – even a picture of McKinley and the Community Centre.

Kurt tried to say to himself that it wasn’t a big deal. After all, he’d never had the intention of hiding Blaine; he was proud of him, not ashamed. They were doing nothing wrong. They were just dating and it only made to the news because Kurt Hummel never dated. So the news,   
per se, wasn’t a scandal. It was just one more gossip column about a celebrity and it would soon be forgotten.

However, the way it was written made Blaine look like a pathetic, frail thing that Kurt had to protect and hide. What worried Kurt most was the impact the unwanted fame would have on Blaine. He had once mentioned that after the bashing the local reporters never left his front   
yard until his father called the cops to chase them away. His name appeared in every Lima newspaper and the news even made to the TV. It had made Blaine hate the first months after the bashing even more.

He tried to call Blaine several times on Thursday, but it always went straight to voicemail. His father’s phone appeared not to be working, nor the Community Centre’s. Kurt was getting desperate to talk to Blaine; he seemed to have disappeared into thin air. That was, until Cooper called him.

“I’m with him, don’t worry,” Cooper explained. “We had to turn off all the telephones because the stupid reporters wouldn’t stop calling. Don’t worry; no one came here to pester him so far.”

“Can I talk to him?”

“He’s working now, Kurt. He took a double shift at the Centre so Nick and Jeff could go celebrate their anniversary or something like that, I’m not sure. You can call him tomorrow.”

“Is he okay?”

“He says he is,” Cooper said. “But I’m not sure how much is true.”

On Friday, Kurt could barely function. He hadn’t talked to Blaine yet and his heart felt heavy, cold, like several stones had decided to move to his chest. He almost forgot his lines twice that night and after the curtain call he hurried to the SUV without stopping.

“Here,” Annie threw a duffle bag on his lap. “You have a plane to Dayton in one hour.”

“But the play…”

“Melanie will take care of it. As long as you’re here for Tuesday’s performance don’t worry about the weekend’s show.”

Kurt nodded in a daze, wondering if he should call Cooper to let him know he was coming, but when he looked for his cell phone in his pockets he realized Annie had it. “No way, Kurt. This will stay here with me. Let me handle the unwanted calls. You and Puppy have a lot to talk about and this will only make you even more anxious. Now go.”

If someone asked Kurt later how he went from New York to Dayton then to a cab that would take him to Lima, he wouldn’t be able to tell them. He went through the motions like a robot, talking only when he needed to ask for cold mineral water on the plane then giving Blaine’s address in Lima to the taxi driver. He felt suspended in midair, his whole life on hold, hanging by a thread. He didn’t know what to expect once he arrived at Blaine’s house. He hadn’t been able to contact the young man for three days, and it was eating at him that maybe Blaine was hiding from him on purpose. 

It was barely seven am when the taxi arrived at Blaine’s house. Kurt felt exhausted but fidgety and after he paid the driver he walked slowly to Blaine’s door. Despite the early hour the windows were open and Percival was already running outside. The dog didn’t make a sound when he saw Kurt, just rested his head on Kurt’s leg, a signal that he wanted to be petted. Kurt put his hand distractedly on Percival’s head; there were voices coming from inside. He knew he should knock at the door or maybe use the key Blaine had given him months ago, but he didn’t. He stayed there, paralyzed, listening to Blaine and Cooper’s conversation like a curious little girl. He was unable to move.

“You knew this could happen, Squirt,” Cooper’s voice said. 

“Don’t call me that,” came Blaine’s annoyed voice.

“Whatever. Still, it was no one’s fault.”

“We were careless,” said Blaine, and Kurt’s heart ached at the dismay he heard in his voice.

“Yes you were, but let’s face it; you wouldn’t be able to hide your relationship forever, would you?”

“I know, Coop,” a sigh, then. “I always knew that everyone would find out, eventually.”

“Then why the freak out? When you started dating Kurt he was already famous.”

“I know. But… did you read everything, Coop? The way they wrote that thing, like all I want is a sugar daddy, as if because of what happened, now I’m some kind of retarded and I need someone to take care of me?”

“That’s just crappy journalism and you know it. In a couple of weeks no one will even remember this.”

“But I will,” Blaine said, sounding angry. “I will, because now the reporters won’t stop calling my house, Burt’s house and I can imagine it’s only a fraction of how much they’re calling Kurt.”

“Kurt is a big boy and, believe me, he’s more than used to dealing with gossips and all the shit that comes with notoriety.”

“But if I were normal, Coop, I bet they wouldn’t bother him so much.”

“You were what?” Cooper sounded angry now. “What bull shit is that?”

“I mean, a normal guy, with a normal life. If I were someone just interested in Kurt for his money and his fame I bet no one would bat an eye.”

“Are you feeling sorry for yourself? “Cooper’s tone was still angry. “Because that’s not the Blaine I know.”

“Everyone’s entitled to a little self-pity.” 

“Not you,” Cooper’s voice was higher. “You’ve always been a fighter. That’s why Kurt loves you.”

“Well, maybe he shouldn’t,” Blaine snapped.

“But he does,” Cooper declared with finality. “Now I ask you: what are you going to do about it, Blaine? Will you let a stupid tabloid tear you and Kurt apart?”

Blaine’s voice was incredulous. “Who said anything about me and Kurt apart? God, Cooper!”

“So stop acting like the Little Mermaid, Squirt; you can’t have both worlds - the land and the sea. You can’t be anonymous and date a famous guy. I’d rather you’d be like Mulan and make your life happen.”

“Did you just compare me to a Disney princess?” Blaine sounded annoyed. “Really, Coop? Really?”

“I’m trying to use a metaphor here, okay, so my stubborn brother can pay attention to what I’m saying!” Cooper said, exasperatedly. “Look, the point is: you want Kurt? You’re gonna have to deal with his world. And his world means dealing with the media. They’re not always nice, everybody knows that, but artists need them; it’s publicity. Of course if you stay with him, people will talk about you too, here and there. Once the novelty passes, it will be just noise in the background. What’s most important here is that you love each other. He makes you happy? Stay with him. Or, be a coward and stay unhappy for the rest of your life.”

“I’m going for a walk,” Blaine declared. “And by the way, you’re completely wrong. Ariel never wanted to stay in the sea; she wanted to go to the land, where Eric was.”

“Yeah,” Cooped snorted. “And look how brave she was for going after what she wanted; look all the shit she went through for her prince. She left her comfort zone, Blaine. Maybe it’s time you leave yours.”

Kurt heard Blaine sighing heavily, muttering “you’re unbelievable”, and Kurt ran for the door, stopping in front of it the exact moment Blaine opened it.

“Blaine,” he breathed, letting his duffel bag drop to the floor.

Blaine’s arms were already around his waist dragging him closer, and Blaine’s nose was buried in the side of Kurt’s neck. Blaine’s hands didn’t stop squeezing and grabbing at his back, as if Blaine was afraid that Kurt would disappear.

“Kurt,” Blaine whispered, pulling Kurt inside the house and closing the door with one of his feet.

“Hey, I’m still here,” Kurt heard Cooper’s voice saying, and “I.. um… I’m the one who’s going for a walk.” 

Kurt and Blaine remained glued to each other, firm into the embrace, only separating when they heard the door banging behind Cooper.

“Kurt,” Blaine said again, this time with relief. His mouth sought Kurt’s in a deep and desperate kiss and he pulled them both to the couch, Kurt on top of him.

“I’m sor-“ Kurt started, but Blaine silenced him with another kiss.

After what seemed like hours, or maybe it was just a couple of minutes, Blaine let Kurt go. “Don’t say you’re sorry. You didn’t do anything.”

“Still, it is because of me that your life is on display like that.”

“It would happen sooner or later.” Blaine kissed Kurt again, this time softly.

“But it freaked you out,” Kurt prodded.

“It freaked me out,” Blaine confirmed. Then he held Kurt tighter, as if admitting that would make Kurt leave. “I just… need to get used to the fact that people are talking about me,” he said with uncertainty.

“Blaine…” Kurt started.

Blaine pleaded, “Please Kurt, not now.” His kisses turned more desperate, his grasp on Kurt’s back and shoulders more frantic. ”I need you,” he said between kisses, “I love you,” he whispered on and on like a prayer.

Kurt hovered over him, asking himself how he could love someone so much. “We’ll be alright,” he vowed as he pinned Blaine to the couch with his body. “I’m never saying goodbye to you. Never.”

\---

They tried to talk about it several times: about why Blaine had freaked out so much; about why Kurt felt so guilty; about why Blaine startled every time the phone rang; about why Kurt had the feeling that Blaine would break up with him but they couldn’t. Every time one of them tried to start talking about the topic, the other would start with kisses that always led to them naked in Blaine’s bed. If Kurt wanted to talk about it, Blaine only whispered ‘please, not now’ and started kissing Kurt like he would never see him again. If Blaine opened his mouth to say ‘maybe we should talk’, Kurt was the one who shook his head ‘no’ and they would end up in bed again, clutching at each other and repeating each other’s names with a new level of reverence and desperation.

The day came when Kurt had to go back to New York again and their lives, once more, would be apart from each other. Only, after all the drama and confusion Kurt had a strange feeling, like there was something looming over their heads; one big decision one of them would have to make. The mere thought of what this decision would be filled him with fear.

Blaine’s past – or lack of one – wouldn’t go away. He couldn’t keep hiding from it. Someone would always end up remembering it, talking about it; it would always be there. As traumatic as not having a clue who he was could be, Blaine would have to deal with that, accepting it had happened and moving on. He knew that deep inside Blaine had already done that. That’s why he lived his life in such a carefree manner: because he’d always thought he had nothing to lose since he had already lost everything.

Kurt knew that the smiles Blaine threw at the world hadn’t come to him easily. It had been a learning process, finding who he was among all the things people told him about himself. He smiled with the freedom of one that could live his life as he pleased; the freedom of not needing much to be happy. All Blaine needed was a place to feel at home and he had found that in the same city where his life had drastically changed. Only now, instead of bullies, Blaine was surrounded by friends, with a job that made difference in people’s lives. He felt safe and at peace here.

All of this had changed the moment Kurt was added to the equation. Kurt’s life would never be simple; it would never have the poetic simplicity of being anonymous. Was it fair to take this from Blaine? Was it fair to take him away from his home town and let his life be scrutinized and judged, their beautiful love story turning into just one more gossip column?

Kurt Hummel loved Blaine Anderson with all his heart. That’s why he would leave the ball in Blaine’s court. 

“I will always love you, Blaine,” he said, as they held each other in front of Blaine’s house, the taxi already waiting for Kurt.

“Are you breaking up with me?” Blaine asked, his expression a little desperate.

“Never. “Kurt assured him. “I have no reason to. But I don’t want you to feel pressured to stay with me. It will always be complicated and sometimes when we go for a walk, someone will take pictures of us and they will want to hear about you… and, unless I leave the theatre, it will always be like this.”

“You can’t leave the theatre!” Blaine said vehemently, not letting Kurt go. “You’re a star, and your place is and will always be on the stage.”

“Blaine… I have to go. But I want you to take all the time you want to think about us, about what you want from our relationship. Think about how great it will be if we stay together, but think about all the consequences, too. Whatever you decide, on whatever terms… I’ll be waiting. We’ve been together for such a short time, but I can’t imagine my life with you anymore.“

“Please, Kurt…” Blaine kissed Kurt, and it tasted salty and sad. “Don’t give up on us. I love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” Kurt kissed Blaine again. “I’ll call you tomorrow, alright?”

“This is not goodbye, right?” Blaine said, before Kurt could get in the cab.

“Not for me. Never for me,” was all Kurt could think to say.

TBC  
  


 

 


	10. Chapter 10

Strangely, they started to talk only by phone, the Skype sessions totally forgotten. It only made it harder to look at each other knowing they couldn’t touch. Kurt’s eyes clenched in his chest every time his cell phone rang and it wasn’t Blaine. Would Blaine stop calling one day? Sometimes Kurt felt he was being distant, like there was something he wanted to say and couldn’t.   
  
Then one day Blaine didn’t call. Kurt spent the whole day in a state of unease that almost drove Annie and Rachel crazy. Before he went to bed, though, his cell phone buzzed. It was from Blaine. “Don’t forget I love you,” it said, and Kurt, after sending an “I love you too”, went to sleep feeling a lot lighter.  
  
After that Blaine only texted Kurt. Only once, at night, variations of “I love you” that made Kurt feel better but not quite. It went on like that for two weeks and Kurt was starting to go nuts. Maybe leaving the ball in Blaine’s court hadn’t been such a good idea. It had seemed noble and mature, giving Blaine the time he needed to put his head in order, sort out his traumas and his life. But the ‘texting once a day’ policy was almost making Kurt bite all his nails with worry.  
  
“You have a meeting today,” Annie announced in late April.  
  
“On a Saturday?” Kurt complained. He was going to corner Blaine that night; he was going to call him, ball in his court be damned.   
  
“The producers want to talk about a new play. Wear a suit,” she said, throwing said suit at him. Well, not really throwing, because she’d always treated Kurt’s clothes as reverently as he did.  
  
“Where have you been all day?” he wanted to know.’  
  
“Working,” she said. “Rearranging your agenda for the next week, because they want you to have all your days free.”  
  
Kurt groaned. “Don’t tell me they’ll have another marathon of interviews.”  
  
“Ask Melanie, she’s your agent; I’m just your PA.”  
  
Melanie’s cell phone went to voice mail all the times Kurt tried to call her. At five Kurt was ready, wearing his suit, inside the SUV. He opened his cell phone but there was no text from Blaine. Not that Kurt was expecting one now; it was still early. Blaine’s “I love you”s only came late at night when Kurt was too tired to do anything but reply. How could Kurt have fallen in love for someone so strange?  
  
“Here we are, sir,” Harry said, stopping the SUV.  
  
“Here? Are you sure?” Kurt looked around. “The Brooklyn Botanic Garden?”  
  
Harry shrugged. “I don’t know, sir, Miss Annie just asked me to bring you here and wait.”  
  
“This place is huge,” Kurt said, wondering if there was a meeting room here and why the producers had chosen this place. “How will I find Melanie?”  
  
“Miss Annie said something about the Cherry Esplanade.”  
  
Kurt started to walk muttering under his breath about Melanie and her idea of a meeting. Soon he stopped complaining to himself, because he’d never been in the Botanic Garden before, and it was truly beautiful.  
  
It was easy to see that the Cherry Esplanade was the most beautiful place in the whole Garden. The sight was breathtaking. The grass was the purest shade of green. The trees were in their first bloom, covered in the most beautiful pink Kurt had ever seen. There were posters announcing the “Sakura Matsuri festival” all over the place, and Kurt took note of the date because he would definitely want to come, his schedule allowing.  
  
He looked around, looking for Melanie with the guys in suits that always accompanied her but he was alone in the place. There were only a few children running on the grass, far from where Kurt was. t Apart from the children and their parents, Kurt was alone.  
  
A movement caught his eye on the left and he turned, a retort to his agent already in his mouth…and there was Blaine, beautiful, wonderful, adorable Blaine, wearing a black tuxedo and a black bowtie. His hair was gelled in a way Kurt had never seen before, making him look a little older and formal. His face was serious but his eyes were shining with happiness. Kurt’s heart started to jump inside his chest.  
  
“I love you,” was the first thing Blaine said as soon as he approached Kurt.  
  
“You made that clear in the twenty-something texts you’ve been sending me these couple of weeks,” Kurt tried to sound bitchy, but he could feel he was smiling too.  
  
“I was afraid I would spoil everything if I talked to you.”  
  
“Everything?”  
  
“This. I wanted to surprise you. Cooper suggested the texts so you’d know I was still thinking of you.”  
  
Kurt snorted. ”Cooper has some brilliant ideas.”  
  
“Annie agreed.”  
  
“Annie?” Kurt’s eyes widened. “She watched me sulking for weeks and didn’t say anything? Some friend she is,” he muttered, but he was smiling.  
  
Blaine took a step that brought him right in front of Kurt. “Aren’t you curious?” he asked.  
  
“Oh. I am, about a lot of things. But first, I want a kiss,” Kurt said, pulling Blaine closer.  
  
“Not yet,” Blaine said, disentangling himself from Kurt. “I have some important things to say and if I don’t say them now and we start kissing, I never will.”   
  
“Okay,” Kurt said, trying to calm his pounding heart.  
  
“You know why I brought you here?” Blaine asked.  
  
“I have no idea, but it’s a beautiful place,” Kurt answered.   
  
“It’s because of the cherry blossoms,” Blaine started.   
  
Kurt turned his head to look at the flowers, but he still didn’t understand.  
  
“Listen, Kurt…These trees, they are originally from Japan, did you know that?” when Kurt shook his head, Blaine went on. “But here they are, beautiful, perfect, blossoming in a foreign country. Their beauty didn’t diminish; neither did their strength, even though they’re so far away from home. They just found another home; another place to grow and live, and they look so beautiful that it’s easy to see they’re happy.”  
  
“Blaine…what are you trying to say?” Kurt asked, not daring to hope.  
  
Blaine hadn’t finished. “In Japan, cherry blossoms also symbolize clouds because they bloom all at the same time. They are a metaphor for how short life is because they are so beautiful but their blossom period is so short.”  
  
Blaine put his hands on Kurt’s shoulders. “Just like the cherry blossoms, I don’t belong to this place. New York is yours, not mine. But just like they adapted, I can adapt, too. Just like they’re here blossoming, beautiful and full of life, I think I can be happy here. Their life is short, so is ours, and I don’t want to waste my life away from the man I love. But all of this can only happen if you stay with me”  
  
Kurt hugged Blaine so tight he was afraid he would break him. “Do you even have to ask?” he said, grinning madly, like a lunatic, drunk on happiness and love. “And hey, you outdid yourself with the cheesy lines this time,” he said close to Blaine’s ear, ”but I loved every word you said.”  
  
“The cheesy lines are included in the deal. If you take me, they come too.”  
  
Kurt smiled softly. “There will never be a time when I won’t tease you about them. But they’re part of you, so I love them too”  
  
Blaine’s face turned a little more serious. “I think it’s time for me to leave my comfort zone and go after the things I want. And what I want is you, Kurt. It’s always been you, from the start.”   
  
“Blaine… I don’t know what to say. This is all I’ve wanted to hear for a long time...”  
  
“Say you’re happy,” Blaine grinned.  
  
“Are you kidding? Hey, that’s why Annie cleared my schedule for the week, then? How long will you stay?” Kurt wanted to know, already planning all the free time he and Blaine would have together.  
  
Blaine blushed deep red. “I… um… I took a leap of faith here…A big one.”  
  
“Meaning?”  
  
Blaine took a deep breath. “Meaning I quit my job, applied for my Master’s degree here in New York, and I called my old teacher, Professor Wesley Montgomery. He got me a job interview in a school for children with disabilities in a couple of days.   
  
“W-What about the Community Centre in Lima?”  
  
“Nick and Jeff are more than capable of taking care of everything.”  
  
“What about your house?”  
  
“It’s still there. I didn’t have the heart to sell it.”  
  
“And - and Percival?”  
  
“Percival is at Annie’s house where I left all my suitcases this morning, when I arrived. I’ve been hiding there the whole day, rehearsing my speech so you would take me back.”  
  
“Silly,” Kurt said softly, “I never let you go. I was just waiting for a sign. Don’t you see? You’re my world.”  
  
“I love you, Kurt. And I want to be with you forever, famous or not. I want to live with you, go to all your plays, sit in the front row and throw you roses; so everyone will know you’re mine. When they ask about me and my ‘oh so sad’ past, I’ll only talk about my future and the man I love, the one who makes me happy.”  
  
“How did you change your mind so fast?”  
  
“I didn’t. I mean, I’m still freaking out a little. But without you, not all the safety of Lima would make me happy. The life I built for myself there was awesome but without you, it was just plain and boring. You give me courage, Kurt. You’re my life, and from now on I want to spend all the time I can making sure you never forget that.”  
  
“Can I kiss you now?” Kurt murmured, close to Blaine’s mouth. Because God, he wanted to.  
  
Blaine’s answer was to grasp at Kurt’s arms firmly while Kurt pulled him by the waist and finally their lips met in a sweet and long kiss, full of promises. There would be no more waiting, no more distance between them. Kurt’s heart finally stopped beating fast, acquiring the steady, calm rhythm and the warmth that only people who are loved back can feel.   
  
Kurt and Blaine were safe in each other’s arms. They’d found home in each other. That was all that mattered now. The rest would come with time. Blaine would never remember the first eighteen years of his life, but now that he and Kurt were starting a new life together it was time to finally let the past go and to make new memories in the life he and Kurt would build together. Kurt would make sure each one of those memories were happy ones. They had all the time in the world.  
  
\---  
EPILOGUE  
  
 _“Kurt Hummel’s new musical is a huge success. “Coming Around Again”, running since last month at the Foxwoods Theatre, is already an acclaimed success by the public and the critics. Paired again with his best friend, Rachel Berry, the musical is a love story told from the end to the beginning. The creative way it’s being told, plus Kurt and Rachel’s talent is taking everyone’s breath away. Hummel and Berry have been bringing the house down every night. They not only star in the musical, they co-wrote the script for the play together with Kurt’s fiancée, Mr. Blaine Anderson. While Mr. Anderson composed and arranged all the songs for the musical, he prefers to remain out of the spotlight. He currently is a Professor of Music Therapy at NYU “Kurt is the star, not me,” he says with love in his eyes, “I’m just the planet orbiting around him.” And some planet he is; the CD with the songs he composed for the musical is already in the top ten this year. “I’ve never been happier,” Mr. Hummel says about his musical. Speaking of happiness, Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson will finally tie the knot next week. The ceremony, only for family and closest friends, will take place on the 30th, at the Cherry Esplanade on Brooklyn Botanic Garden. When asked why they chose the place Mr. Hummel said it is where he first remembers truly feeling happy. As you can see, he’s still enigmatic but brilliant. We look forward to seeing the Hummel/Anderson partnership not only on the stage but also in life. To say these young men seem promising together is an understatement.”_  
  
NY Times, April 23rd, 2028.  
  
THE END


End file.
